Never Give Me the Mic

Bill Killed Himself

2009-06-05T20:42:00.004-04:00

This is a day old but I couldn't get to a computer yesterday because of various reasons and unfortunately my elaborate report on this has long since expired. But here are my humble thoughts on the passing of David Carradine...

Appearing over 100 movies in his lifetime, David Carradine is probably best know for two things - being selected over Bruce Lee to star in a TV show Bruce Lee created (in yellowface), and Bill, which Uma Thurman seeks to kill in Kill Bill. Although I don't really know his repertoire outside of these two works, and not all that thrilled with the unfortunate place he has in Bruce Lee lore, it's important to view from the right (or at least a more understanding) point-of-view.

Keep in mind that Carradine got the role in the 1970s, when people were not used to seeing ethnic minorities in their homes (on the tube). Although it's really tragic that Bruce Lee did not get to star in the show that he gave birth to, can you really blame network television? Carradine was a pawn in the whole thing, not a player.

June is busting out all over...

2009-06-01T19:56:00.002-04:00

June is finally here! In the old days that meant summer vacation, no more gym class, playing video games, and sleeping until noon (my god I was a loser). Nowadays it just meant that it's 5 months into the new year, and it's also getting pretty damn hot out.

But even though the lazy days of yore are long gone, replaced by normal days at an office, there are still a few things I'm looking forward to in the next 30 days or so:

1. My cousin's getting married in Toronto and I'm more than happy to get out of the tri-state area for a while. haven't been anywhere besides boroughs, upstate Connecticut, and Jersey since July of last year and I'm super excited to hit the nice sandy beaches of Lake Ontario, "The Northern Riviera," and partake in there delicious cuisine, the delicate and artery-clogging poutine (basically disco fries with cheese curds).

2. The New York Asian Film Festival is getting all the film geeks and yellow fever patients all giddy and excited. Commencing roughly on the third week of June for the last 8 years, this festival serves up a sampling of recent Asian blockbusters from all over. I wish I could say that I'm pumped to see When the Full Moon Rises, a homage to 60s Malaysian cinema featuring, crime, sex, werewolves, and midgets, but alas I'll be in Toronto, getting lost on Blue Jay Way with my cousin and my new cousin. Nevertheless, the NYAFF is great because it runs directly into...

3. JAPAN CUTS: Festival of New Japanese Film, a film festival that showcases contemporary Japanese cinema without the usual doses of anime, samurai, and giant monsters (although school girls appear in several films). This also happens to be the festival I'm working on at my internship at Japan Society. I'm particularly excited about Love Exposure, a 4-hour long opus about pornography and religion(!)

So there you have it folks, my plans for the next 3 weekends. I think I'm gonna be dizzy.

Lou Ye defies China's government like a total badass

2009-05-26T19:55:00.003-04:00

Few film genres fascinate me more than Mainland Chinese Cinema. In a country that has experienced rapid, hyper social and economic growth, and still sprinting forward with no end in sight, filmmakers impacting the international film scene, dubbed the sixth generation, are turning out movies with limited funds, but endless talent.

Zhang Yimou might own the Chinese box office and pack in theaters in the U.S., Wong Kar-Wai may be the the Chinese voice in the stuffy art-house film world, but guys like Jia Zhang-ke, Wang Xiao-shuai, and Zhang Yuan capture a different part of China that is nowhere to be found in wuxia epics and restless youth dramas - that of its changing landscapes (not necessarily political/economic/social) distilled in snapshots of the daily lives of Chinese.

And perhaps the most maverick all contemporary Chinese directors today Lou Ye, a man whose movies like Suzhou River and The Summer Palace have earned him accolades from foreign audiences and lengthy film bans from the Chinese government. Since he works outside of the Chinese film system, his works are usually deemed illegal by the government and cannot be shown in Chinese movie theaters (thank god for bootleg dvds).

His 2006 Tiananmen Square riot film, The Summer Palace, got him banned from filmmaking for 5 years in China, but that didn't stop him. His latest film, Spring Fever, won Best Screenplay at the Cannes Film Festival this year. Lou had secretly shot the film in Nanjing and smuggled it to France, effectively shaking a big ol' middle finger at the Chinese government's authority.

This will no doubt piss off the Chinese government and may result in harsher consequences, such as imprisonment, but that doesn't bother Lou, who says in an interview, "I hope young directors will be free and will be independent enough to make their own films."

Lou Ye, you are a rock star.

Politicalicious!

2009-05-26T19:14:00.008-04:00

I usually don't digress about politics, partially because there are people and bloggers far more qualified to argue points from every angle, and also because my views are always right.*

But today is a different day indeed.

First, California's state supreme court voted to uphold Proposition 8, a big piece of hate steak that prevents same-sex marriage in the already flamboyant backside of America, pissing off many left-wingers and makes guys like me, who live in the giant liberal bubble that is New York City, question what the hell the rest of the country is thinking. Although the court ruled in favor of the ban 6-1, they unanimously decided against annulling some 18,000 same-sex marriages that took place before Prop 8 was propped up. I guess all that homo propaganda was made in vain.

In other news, President Obama nominated Sonia Sotomayor, a Bronx native, to the U.S. Supreme Court. If appointed Ms. Sotomayor will be the first Hispanic to serve as a Supreme Court Justice. Gotta Love Bam Bam for adding color to the high offices of politics. New Yorkers do! Republican('t)s are already getting all hot and bothered, concerned with her personal politics and inability to make judgements without her feelings getting in the way, which is also a pretty big problem among school children.

And of course the great American scholar, Rush Limbaugh, wants her slathered in fail sauce.

*If the post didn't make this clear enough I'm pretty far left.

Washington Square Park shakes itself free from construction fences

2009-05-19T22:37:00.003-04:00

Washington Square Park, the Jardin Du Luxembourg of the West

Today was the first day that the fountain of Washington Square Park, which had been under construction for the last 18 months, was opened to the public, and damn it looks gorgeous! Although it has a new gentrified feeling to it, it won't be long before the street performers, buskers, and pot dealers return, ushering in the old look and feel of the place.

Hopefully I'll get a chance to make it down here a few times this summer. As a graduate of NYU (and part of the last class to graduate in the "olde" park) I spent countless hours there reading, people watching, tossing frisbees, and nursing hangovers.

When I returned from China last summer I found, to my dismay, that I could not sit out near the fountain, sipping ice coffee and flipping through the Village Voice. It was like walking past a restaurant that made great sandwiches and seeing that it was boarded up, with the insides jumbled and deserted like a post-apocalyptic movie set.

Curbed has more pictures, but I'd definitely go see it for yourself.

Former Yankee Stadium turns former mayor into pothead, fans into dirtbags

2009-05-18T20:38:00.003-04:00

Old (shitty) Yankee Stadium is being cut up and sold off like a freshly slaughtered pig. Everything, and I mean everything, is for sale for a hefty price. The back of those creaky spectator seats go for around $250.

Perhaps more idiotic are the other things up for sale. For example, $80 will get you a whopping tablespoon of fresh dirt from the old ballpark. I wonder if Steiner Sports and Marketing, the carpetbaggers that are behind this massive sell off, scam their customers by eye-balling the measurements. Or perhaps they're so jubilant about selling away soil for 80 bucks a pop that they're throwing in an earthworm to may the soil fertile so that one day it can grow into its very own sports stadium.

But it doesn't stop there. Celebrities are trying to secure a piece of the park before the cannibalistic fans get to them. Mariano Rivera was to buy the bullpen, Bernie Williams wants the outfield fence, and Johnny Damon wants the foul poles to put in his back yard.

Rudy Giuliani, two-time mayor of New York City and full-time scumbag, is also interested in buying some land from the stadium too. A representative from Steiner was quoted, "[Guiliani] definitely wants grass..."

Read the New York Post story here.

Vulture reminds us how SNL didn't suck this season.

2009-05-16T00:12:00.003-04:00

It used to be commonplace among TV junkies to refer to the late night sketch comedy show, Saturday Night Live, as Saturday Night Dead - for all the horrid jokes that were massacred on air from poor performances, poor writing, and sometimes a combination of both. To be honest, I stopped watching when Molly Shannon left back years ago and didnt really tune in again until this season, and what a season to tune in.

Vulture, New York Magazine's culture blog, did a nice little run down of its 10 favorite sketches of the season. Although I think that they put too much emphasis on cultural context (c'mon, did the Palin sketches really affect the elections that much?) and sometimes are just plan wrong (the Mark Walhberg sketch was funny because it was silly and it actually pissed off Marky Mark, not because Andy Samberg did a spot on impression) but all in all a good selection.

I'll be posting some of my favorite sketches that didn't make the cut below. Enjoy!

Famous Italian American makes film about another famous Italian American

2009-05-15T09:35:00.003-04:00

I'm sure you've heard by now that Martin Scorsese, the 5 foot 4 talking teddy bear, has been signed to direct a biopic on Frank Sinatra, making this one delicious taco of Italian America. If you are as excited as your dad is, you'll be speculating who will play Ol' Blue Eyes in the comments below, but since no one reads this blog, I'm gonna throw it out there and say Eddie Murphy in white face.

In other news, Bret "the Threat" Ratner will be teaming up once again with Chris Tucker for their own little Sinatra film, with the protagonist being one of Sinatra's valets played by Tucker. Jackie Chan is probably wise not to get involved.

1 month, 10 lbs, and hundreds of dollars later...

2009-05-10T12:43:00.004-04:00

Yesterday was the last day of my self-imposed abstinence from alcohol, which means that I'll probably be wasted for the next week or so, not because I'll be making up for lost time, but because my tolerance at this point is that of a sick chihuahua. Half a beer would probably send me into a drunken frenzy, rambling like an idiot and making rash decisions, all leading up to passing out on the cold tiles of the bathroom floor.

Nevermind that, let's talk about my fast.

First, about health. Since I didn't consume any cancerous liquids for the past month my body's probably in a healthier condition, although I've substituted one vice for another, that vice being general gluttony. It seems like I have no qualms about ordering dessert, or eating dinner twice in a night if the food is good. But even with my fatass behavior, I still somehow managed to lose 10 pounds, which says a lot about the calories in liquor, or the quantity of it that I consume.

Money was also another reason for not drinking. at 7-8 bucks a glass, beer is quite expensive, and I'd spend nearly $200 a week for about 3-4 nights out. But now with my drink choices limited to club soda and water, I spend only about $20 max on my nights out (seltzer water and coca-cola add up!). This means that I'm saving about $180 a week and $720 per month, which allows me to make rent payments and eat dinner twice.

One of my biggest concerns about this undertaking was the effects it would have on my social life. It was awkward at first to explain to my friends that I wasn't drinking with them but gradually they understood my reasons...or they stopped caring after their 3rd drink. Overall it really didn't matter to them if I was as inebriated as they were, as long as we were laughing just as hard.

But will all the benefits that came with this project, there is one thing that I long for more than anything else - beer. I don't think I missed alcohol more than I did this month, and at times it has been a real challenge for my willpower. There were times when I needed a stiff drink to make the conversation less awkward or a glass of wine to go with my food. Just as drinking for 30 days seems unreasonable, staying dry for that long is just as foolish. Alcohol was invented for a reason - to take the edge off situations, to lighten us up, calm us down, and make us realize that life is more fun than we imagine it to be.

I think this all leads to the point that I need to learn about moderation.

Manny Ramirez does steroids too!

2009-05-07T20:23:00.003-04:00

"Take me to your dealer."

The steroid witch hunts get more interesting by the day. This reminds me of high school when classmates upon finding out that other classmates smoked pot reacted with a wide range of reactions from "OMG he does drugs?!?" to "I knew it all along."

Now it seems like former Boston Red Sox and current L.A. Dodger Manny Ramirez has tested positive for performance enhancing substances. Apparently, he took the drugs, believing it was not considered steroids, for personal issues... such as hitting more home runs.

Major League Baseball slapped a 50 game suspension on his ass, meaning that he won't be able to play again until early July. The best part? He's being suspended without pay, which means he'll lose about $7.7 million. I feel sorry for him already.

Paramount turns Asian casts white, doesn't apologize

2009-05-06T20:57:00.003-04:00

This one truly got me upset. It seems like the movie version of the animated TV series, Avatar: The Last Airbender, whose all Asian characters were replaced by a predominantly white cast, is starting to see some backlash from fans of the series and filmgoers alike. Check out this youtube channel devoted to people telling Paramount why they are boycotting the film.

The kind folks over at Paramount are having a little trouble dealing with this bad press, as a press release from The Media Action Network for Asian Americans (MANAA) points out:

"On his Twitter, producer Frank Marshall continues to deny the production has discriminated by giving opportunities for actors of color to white performers. After a series of twitters back and forth between angry fans and himself, Marshall made his final comment on the subject last week saying, "The casting is complete and we did not discriminate against anyone," defensively adding, "I am done talking about it."

Someone has an attitude...

The producers said to have had an opening casting call, claiming that they did not discriminate against race for the film, and it just so happens that the best actors and actresses for the 4 lead roles are white.

Right, so when Paramount puts out a casting call for a romantic comedy set in New York City, or an action blockbuster set in L.A., they seriously consider Asians, Latinos, and blacks for the lead role? Imagine Terence Howard and Lucy Liu in a romantic comedy, or Kal Penn and Jennifer Lopez in a cop thriller.

And as if that wasn't enough, Viacom, Paramount's parent company, pulled a Mother China and has shut down Racebending.com's Zazzle store, which sold protesting apparel, claiming all but one of the products "contained content in violation of Viacom's intellectual property rights" - WORDS, people. Not just images, but words.

Why do I care? I have never seen Avatar nor do I plan to start watching but shit like this has gone on for far too long. It's time to take action, and it's time for actors and actresses of color to take back their roles.

Check out racebending.com for more info.

Restaurant ninjas scares diners to aid digestion...

2009-05-06T20:40:00.007-04:00

"Supplies!"

This has got to be the weirdest/most awesome thing I heard this week. Apparently there is a ninja-themed sushi joint in Tribeca that features... wait for it... assholes dressed like feudal Japanese spies who scare you while you eat your $70 omakase. The restaurant, simply called Ninja, has a dining room decorated to look like a medieval Japanese village, a perfect place for a ninja to hide out and assassinate you with the restaurant's stupid concept.

And you know what the kicker is? They perform magic tricks for you after you've finished your overpriced garbage food for a tip.

The world is ending.

Check out the restaurant here.

Baseball geeks scrutinize A-Rod, Rickey Henderson stories way more interesting

2009-05-06T19:57:00.007-04:00

"I can't take it anymore!"

As baseball nerds and AM New York readers know, A new biography on Yankees' third baseman Alex Rodriguez came out on Monday, revealing more about his steroid use and uncovering stories that nobody cares about, which apparently supports an idea we already know - A-Rod has issues. Though everyone is eating this book up like it was written by Joe, I don't really see how humanizing a sports celebrity is that big of a deal. It's not like he's any better than the average guy in life.

I find professional sports interesting because of the frivolity of it to our survival yet the importance that many people assign to it (including myself) and its characters. Joe Dimaggio could hit a ball really far a lot of times and Roger Clemens can throw it really fast. Both are famous for these useless skills despite being pretty mediocre people. I'm not sure why our society and many others like it find sports essential, but in any case it's important enough to publish books on it and make the front page of newspapers.

Speaking of which, a friend emailed me a list of anecdotes about Rickey Henderson, a baseball "journeyman" and very colorful character. I had a good kick out of it today and I'm reposting some of my favorite stories here. The entire blog post can be found here.

1. In the early 1980s, the Oakland A’s accounting department was freaking out. The books were off $1 million. After an investigation, it was determined Rickey was the reason why. The GM asked him about a $1 million bonus he had received and Rickey said instead of cashing it, he framed it and hung it on a wall at his house.

2. This one happened in Seattle. Rickey struck out and as the next batter was walking past him, he heard Henderson say, “Don’t worry, Rickey, you’re still the best.”

3. When he was on the Yankees in the mid-1980s, Henderson told teammates that his condo had such a great view that he could see, “The Entire State Building.”

4. To this day and dating back 25 years, before ever game he plays, Henderson stands completely naked in front of a full length locker room mirror and says, “Ricky’s the best,” for several minutes.

5. Rickey was asked if he had the Garth Brooks album with Friends in Low Places and Henderson said, “Rickey doesn’t have albums. Rickey has CDs.”

6. Henderson broke Ty Cobb’s career record for runs scored with a home run. After taking his usual 45 seconds or so around the bases, Rickey slid into home plate.

7. San Diego GM Kevin Towers was trying to contact Rickey at a nearby hotel. He knew Henderson always used fake names to avoid the press, fans, etc. He was trying to think like Rickey and after several attempts; he was able to get Henderson on the phone.

Rickey had checked in under Richard Pryor.

"Ricky's the best!!"

(Thanks Alexis)

meteorologists cry wolf, ruin weekend

2009-05-03T10:53:00.003-04:00

All last week weather forecasts both online and off have been warning the tri-state area of a soggy weekend with nonstop RAIN RAIN RAIN. A wet front was to move in from the south (damn those confederates!) and perch over New York from Friday pretty much until Tuesday.

Well as anyone living in NYC can tell you, yesterday was beautiful. Aside from high humidity, which made Manhattan feel like Saigon, the weather was very comfortable, and quite frankly, there weren't any clouds in the sky (except for the morning, when it did rain a little).

But because of the monstrous, biblical weather described in virtually every forecast I read, I decided to not hit up the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens to see the cherry blossoms and instead opted for a more indoor activity - dim sum. And while dim sum was crazy good and epic (I think we ordered everything on the menu), I missed out on the blossom this year, which is supposed to peak this weekend. Lame sauce.

And of course, on the day that we were suppose to play a baseball game, it's pouring out. Thanks a lot Mother Nature, you bitch.

Beware of Hog Sneeze

2009-04-27T22:28:00.002-04:00

This story broke yesterday but I was too busy playing and didn't get a chance to read up on it until today. Apparently a new strain of influenza that affects pigs, boars, and other delicious swine has mutated and are now affecting humans. Thus far there has been 149 recorded deaths from this virus in Mexico, the country of origin, and yesterday a handful of students in a Queens high school came down with this deadly disease. And as of this morning 40 New Yorkers have been diagnosed. Sounds serious.

But the folks over at The New York Times blog sez to hold off on stocking up on SARS masks. Although this flu arrived at the end of flu season and affected a number of people doesn't mean that a pandemic is coming on. We're gonna crush this swine fever like an ant. We're gonna grab that virus by the balls and swing it back to the land down under, where it came from. That's right, ain't no diseases immigratin' here. Heck even President Obama is pumped for this showdown.

Let's kick ass mutha'uckas!

Summer in April

2009-04-26T22:30:00.003-04:00

The past two days have been crazy delightful because the weather was not ball-freezing. After a good 3 months of temperatures that at times dipped below 20 degrees it's refreshing to be out in the sun without a jacket or winter coat, actually SWEATING from the heat. Naturally we embraced the great weather like bears to honey, excited as ever like boys having just been let out of school.

A few of us went to Central Park yesterday in hopes of a football game. Our foresight came up short and when we got there we found Sheep Meadow densely populated with tanners, picnickers, and frisbee tossers. The place was packed - it was like a scene from a nature channel when they show an ant tunnel and all these ants are crawling over each other in a frenzy.

Anyway, we found a less populated area and after tossing the football around remembering why I didn't bother signing up for tryouts in high school we switched to a sport that was more fitting for me - frisbee. Having played all throughout my adolescence, I adore this lazy sport with great passion, running down throws, flicking the disc sidearm, and just generally enjoying life.

After throwing around for a few hours everyone got tired and hungry and we all went our separate ways. I heard there was a gathering in Alphabet City and after showering and grabbing some food, I ended up on a roof deck on a building on Ave C, looking down on revelers enjoying the warm night and looking out onto the skyline of Manhattan. Gazing, spacing, and dreaming, my friends Rohit, Tara, and Jen talked about both heavy and light subjects, you know, what pretentious college sophomores talk about except with more insight (I hope).

All this thinking made us hungry and we walked over to a pizza place called Artichoke, where at 3am there was a 20 minute wait to order. Tired, sober, and ready for bed, I was in no mood to stick around, and I would have left if I didn't catch a glimpse of their specialty, the artichoke pizza. With about half an inch of cheesy, creamy, cholesterol-raising toppings, I could not resist.

And good thing I didn't, because 20 minutes later I was sitting on the curb of the road with everyone chowing down on the most delicious slice of pizza I've ever had in New York. It was everything I love about artichoke tossed in a cheesy cream sauce topped on a thick hearty pizza.

Today was primarily spent playing baseball, which I haven't done since little league. We weren't expecting a lot of people to show up but somehow manage to round up 16 for a game that usually involves 18 - not too bad for a pick up game. 12 years later and I can still hustle to first base... I also can't throw for my life.

This warm weather was a godsend for me and many New Yorkers. After a cold and terrible winter riddled with bailouts, layoffs, and breakups, these two days made us go out of doors, breathe some air, and get some exercise. Most importantly it reminded us of more carefree days, when all that mattered was the fun you were having.

NYU nixes SAT I in admission requirements

2009-04-21T22:29:00.003-04:00

It was announced today that New York University has taken a great big liberal step by no longer requiring applicants to submit their SAT I scores. The monkeys at the admissions office finally realized the irrelevance of the SAT and decided that it's better to not make it a requirement for admission.

This is great news for the class of 2014, but I on the other hand feel incredibly nauseous when I recall the hours I spend learning how to take that damn test and stressing out about my scores. I hated everything about the SAT - the scores, the preparation, waking up to take the damn test at 7am, the pressure, the competition with friends, the death threats, the showdowns... okay maybe not the last two but if you were a decent student in high school like me scoring low on the SAT really undermines your accomplishments, especially when you're eying a certain college with a high SAT score average among accepted students.

Talking about the SAT for me is like veterans talking about war. I remember the stress and the fear that despite the grades I had and the extracurricular activities I'd done, one test can shut me out of getting into college. This freaked me out beyond all belief, I even lost hair.

And after everything was said and done, the year I had spent preparing for the test, exhausting every last drop of energy in me, was forgotten once I had gotten into my dream school. Never having to take the test again, I realized how much energy I had lost for the sake of this garbage. No wonder why I drank so much in college.

But now high school juniors with NYU in their mind won't have to worry about what I went through. They can excel in class, play all the sports they want, learn music and theatre, and not have to worry about getting to their Princeton Review class on time or cramming an extra 100 vocab words in their lexicon. If only I was 8 years younger.

Read the full article here.

By the way, this is my 100th post. just to show you how significant this number is, 100 is more than 49. More than twice more.

10th anniversary of the Columbine shootings, frat boys can bring guns to class

2009-04-20T21:32:00.007-04:00

Today is the 10th anniversary of the Columbine shootings that left 12 students and a teacher dead and Littleton, Colorado in devastation. This horrible day would make one believe that our government would do everything it can to tighten gun control, or at any rate, ban weapons in schools.

But alas, the brilliance that is the Missouri House passed a bill that would allow students to carry concealed weapons to class. And to prove that the folks in the Missouri House are a sensitive lot, they passed the bill exactly two years after a deranged student killed 32 people at Virginia Tech, the worst single gun attack in American history.

University presidents in Missouri are particularly upset, stating that each school should be able to determine their own policy on gun control and this bill undermines their power... but also because now it's easier for them to get shot at.

Here's a link to a blog post that chronicles all of the school shootings since Columbine. They left out the one at SUNY Binghamton last month that killed 13 people.

Kari Ferrell

2009-04-19T22:57:00.003-04:00

Another person that sets Asian Americans back years his this hipster harpie Kari Ferrell, who conned and cheated poor white folk in Utah and now is at large in Williamsburg Brooklyn, naturally. There, she continues to cheat and scam, mainly from fellow hipsters and the like, falsifying claims like having cancer, being pregnant, having a bad debit card, and being horny.

What I hate about her is that she uses aggressive sex appeal and her Asian identity to hook men in. She has referred to herself as "Korean Abdul-Jabbar" and has told people that she wants to give them a handjob with her mouth. *Tears*

The New York Observer has a pretty thorough article on her, along with an amusing account by one of her block-head victims named Bobby. Gawker seems to be having a field day with this story.

One week in...

2009-04-19T22:42:00.003-04:00

It's been 1 week since I've taken a month-long alcohol fast as part of a three-part plan to detox, save money, and not do embarrassing things in front of friends. How am I holding up?

I feel great. Sleepy, but great. I don't know why I bother with hangovers when I can abstain or cut back and then wake up and actually know where I left my cell phone and shoes.

Financially speaking I am saving loads of money. I cut weekly spending by 2/3... 2/3!!! If I continue this for the next 3 weeks I'll have more than enough case to pay rent AND score a brand-new digital camera.

Apparently I'm not quite as amusing when I'm sober, as a few friends invited me out for a drink and when I told them about this fast, they backed down. I had suggested that we go grab food and after that hit up a bar, except instead of ordering a scotch and soda I'd go straight for a club soda. Understandably it's a bit awkward to be drinking while your friend is stone-cold sober, but good conversations can still happen without alcohol.

I also noticed that it's really fun to observe people getting drunk while remaining clear-minded. This was especially true on Friday night when I was chilling on a roof-top laughing and enjoying my company getting wasted. Somehow I still managed to get home around 4am, which didn't work out very well for me the next morning.

Things are working out so far, but the true test of will-power will come in the 3rd week, when I'll be itching for a sip of beer.

Chien-ming Wang is fail sauce

2009-04-19T00:39:00.004-04:00

woe is me

Chien-ming Wang went from being the best starting pitcher on the Yankees in 2008 to being the biggest loser of the last 2 weeks. Today he lasted 1 1/3 innings against the Clevend Indians, who shacked him up for 8 runs and ultimately crapped all over the new Yankee Stadium with a 22-4 win.

Although I'm not so concerned with the loss today because 156-6 is still a great record, something needs to be done about Wang, who had previously had back-to-back 19 win seasons. How can a pitcher so dominant be so bad 3 times in a row? Furthermore, the poor bastard has an ERA of 34.50 and has pitched in a combined 6 innings this season - a far cry from 5-0 with a 3.23 ERA.

Perhaps he should take some pitching advice from Nick Swisher.

Banh Mi is my lover

2009-04-13T23:36:00.002-04:00

This article is a few days old but nonetheless arousing(!) It's a concise history or banh mi, a French-influenced Vietnamese sandwich. I'm usually not a fan of imperialism but one positive fall-out is the "fusion" of European and Asian cuisine and banh mi is no exception. The French colonists introduced this wonderful gift when a bunch of settlers, tired from exploiting the Vietnamese, would relax with a glass of ice coffee and a simple Parisian sandwich - butter and pate on a baguette.

Of course, the Vietnamese, who in my humble opinion have the Midas touch of food, began experimenting and improving (that's right, I said it) on it, and today we have a scrumptious sandwich that I would have no problem trekking to Brooklyn and waiting in line for.

This article explores the new frontier of the 21st century, banh mi, and how many brave Vietnamese sandwich makers are reinventing and reinvigorating the dish.

Check out one of the hot photos below, and read the full article here.

Easter Sunday and being sober

2009-04-12T23:50:00.005-04:00

Today is Easter Sunday and although my family and I are not religious nor Christian, we view this day as an opportunity to spend time together and cherish each other's company. Today, however, was a bit stressful because I was elected to make Easter dinner for everyone. This can be quite intimidating if both of your parents are great chefs.

I decided to go the traditional route and make Chinese food. Dusting off an old cookbook I got for Christmas one year I whipped up some mapo tofu, twice-cooked pork, and dry-fried string beans. To my surprise my family liked my work and even more shocking was the fact that nobody got sick! Washing your hands really does save a lot of trouble!

Though today marks the end of Lent for many it is a start of a fast for me, and in my case I'm ditching alcohol for one month. If you've ever gone to a bar with me this is normally how it goes:

you: what are you having?
me: Oh I don't know, I don't really feel like drinking tonight.
10 minutes later....
me: More Jager-bombs!

Needless to say I kind of get carried away with drinking, which may be my way of reliving college, relieving stress, or acting on my self-hatred, but either way booze is a big part of my social life, which is why friends upon hearing of my abstinence either burst out in an obnoxious guffaw or look at me with their crazy eyes.

There are several reasons why I decided to stop drinking for a month. First, I consume over 20 drinks a week on average which is chipping away at my health. As I down my 3rd martini for the night I can feel the cancer seeping into my liver and esophagus. Second, those 20 drinks add up to an obscene amount of money, money I can use for more important things like food and rent. And finally, I've done some pretty shitty things when I was trashed, and it probably won't help me out in the long run. This is not to say that I won't go out, it just means that I'll be ordering soda instead and risk being called a pansy by my friends.

So, until May 11th, my goal in life, besides not getting fired and remembering to water the houseplants, is to no consume alcohol. Wish me luck, and don't try to spike my 7-up because that would be total suck.

Anthony Bourdain

2009-04-10T11:07:00.003-04:00

I apologize once again for zero posts this week despite some very newsworthy stories, but since Tuesday I have been glued to my computer screen watching episodes of No Reservations with Anthony Bourdain. For those of you not familiar or don't get the Travel Channel, Anthony Bourdain is a former head chef at Les Halles in New York and after getting famous writing his book Kitchen Confidential, he started his own TV show where he travels around the world and samples food and culture.

I was at first skeptical of this concept, as I have seen many shows before where ugly American chefs bring their arrogant jibber-jabber and inflated egos to foreign countries and thinly veil their condescending criticism with phrases like "It's unique," or "that's interesting."

However, Bourdain does non of that. He treats each culture with the respect that he knows very little about it, and allows himself to become immersed in it. He's not afraid to get embarrassed and takes on every activity and meal with literally no reservations.

But despite all of his eye-opening experiences he never forfeits his personality or his habits. Bourdain drinks like a fish and smokes like film-noir detective. His brilliantly composed introductions on the location's culture often ends with a declaration of hunger, letting us know that besides all the other good stuff, he's really all about food.

Check out this clip from his episode on Uruguay.

Murray Hill douche bags encapsulated in this one song

2009-04-05T18:45:00.003-04:00

Last night a few friends and I were talking about Manhattan neighborhoods we detest (because, y'know, complaining is great) and we all pretty much agree that Murray Hill is a hell hole, particularly the people that live there.

Jews on Foods

2009-04-04T10:26:00.004-04:00

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

M - Th 11p / 10c

Seth Rogen

comedycentral.com

Daily Show Full Episodes

Economic Crisis

Political Humor

Check out this interview with Seth Rogen on the Daily Show last night. Who knew that a few million dollars and Zach and Miri Make a Porno would encourage anyone to go to the gym? Or according to this interview, bulimia. However, now that he's an average sized guy, his bear laugh seems oddly out of place.

Hear Rogen and Jonny Stews talk about food, being Jewish, and Rogen's new movie, Observe and Report, which is like Mall Cop, but not...sort of.

Citi Field filled with food, Brooklyn, and puns

2009-04-03T11:19:00.004-04:00

Today the Mets will play their first game at their new ballpark, Citi Field (haha, Citi). Nevermind the puns and freudian slips that you may be tempted to shout, check out what eater is writing about the food stalls! Renowned chef Dave Pasternack will be serving LOBSTER ROLLS to hungry fans in the same concession stand where you can get Belgian Fries and Shake Shack! This is big step up from the disgusting Premio sausages that they use to slop up at Shea, which looking back was one of the grossest stadiums I've ever experienced (the grossest was by far Veterans' Stadium in Philly, that place sucked).

The new park also pays homage to the team that the Mets filled a void for - The Brooklyn Dodgers. Citi Field's facade is modeled after the one at Ebbets' Field, and Jackie Robinson gets a rotunda named after him (as he should). And if that wasn't enough, there's that old Pepsi-Cola sign over in right field that resembles the old, gloomy sign in Brooklyn that looks out across the East River into Manhattan.

All these goodies are all probably to distract fans from the fact that the Mets are made of fail and may pull a three-peat this season, losing the division to the Phillies by getting beat by the Marlins on the last day of the season after blowing a sizable division lead going into September.

Hopefully this won't have anything to do with it, but maybe it will.

Happy Baseball Season!

New Yankee Stadium, old Yankee airs.

2009-04-03T11:05:00.004-04:00

Check out some pictures of the New Yankee Stadium that the Gothamist posted today! The eleventy-billion dollar homage to the pre-renovated Yankee Stadium was open to fans for the first time yesterday to watch the Yankees take batting practice.

Lots of wows, oohs, and aahs filled the the arena as many people, including Andy Petitte, claimed that the new stadium looks exactly like the old stadium from before 1976, when renovations turned it into a 1970s style ballpark. I guess this means Yankee fans can be even more annoying and smug about their team's long legacy of winning.

The Yankees play their first game in their new home today (weather permitting), an exhibition game against the Chicago Cubs. They'll play their season home-opener on April 16th. Let's hope all that money they spent on players actually pays off.

Unemployment rises, again

2009-04-03T10:49:00.004-04:00

Some more bad news about the job market that makes me more sad about my situation. It's reported today that the jobless rate has reached 8.5%, meaning roughly 13.2 million people are out of work or doing part-time gigs. Although the Fed believes that unemployment rate will peak at about 8.8%, everybody that labels himself an economist seems to believe that it will surpass 10% before things start to get better. Just think for a minute about how scary it would be that in a few months 1 in 10 people won't have a job, never mind the graduating class of 2009 entering the job market. Are you ready for an apocalyptic Road Warrior type world this summer?

So it looks like I'll be an intern/temp for a while, which means the folks over at Japan Society are right in calling me a professional intern, and that I'll be drinking most of my coffee from the coffee machine at my other job.

Nothing kicks off Monday better than fantasizing about Sunday

2009-03-30T20:45:00.004-04:00

Oh Monday, you get such a bad rep because you're the first day of the work week which means everyone who still has a job drags themselves unenthusiastically to the office for 5 more days of productivity.

But there is a silver lining to this dull rain cloud - it's proximity to Sunday, which was only a day before, and the fond memories you were busy making yesterday will fuel you throughout the morning and afternoon!

This Sunday my friend Wallace and I went to get brunch at H.K., in Hell's Kitchen. There's nothing really outstanding about this place except that if you pay and extra $13 with your brunch you get unlimited alcohol until 5pm! Nothing like sloshing away the afternoon over a quarter-pound burger and 6 bellinis. Their full bar also serves Absente, a pussy version of absinthe, but only slightly less inebriating. By the end of it we were feeling so good we went shopping and I bought shoes... which probably wasn't the brightest idea, but damn those shoes are hot.

Sunday is Funday.

H.K. Cafe

523 9th Ave (at E. 39th St)

(212) 947-4208

Cash Only for drunk brunch

Andy Lau maybe likes men, definitely doesn't like his girlfriend

2009-03-30T19:55:00.005-04:00

This may be a shocker to those of you who know Andy Lau, actor of fine films like Infernal Affairs, Warlords, and also of really shitty films like House of Flying Daggers, but there have been rumors flying around for ages that he is gay. I never really gave his sexual ambiguity much thought until I read this blog post over at Ningin this weekend, that apparently Andy cancelled his wedding with his girlfriend of 24 years.

The kicker? He proposed when she told him she was preggers. Then, when he found out that the bump on her belly was just a big stuffed animal under her shirt, he called it off. WTF? That poor (and horrendously stupid) girl follows him around for 24 years and has to fake pregnancy to get him to commit?

And furthermore, how young could she have been when they started dating if she was to convince him that it was biologically possible for her to have children at her present age? Was she 12 when they started pretend shacking? Andy, I never knew you were a pederast.

"Somebody tell my partner to stop dancing!"

Read the full post here.

Possibly the best movie title in all of cinema!

2009-03-28T22:57:00.005-04:00

I have discovered the best film title ever - Stop the Bitch Campaign. I was speechless but after I regained consciousness I did a quick google search and found out what the movie is about:

In Tokyo, prostitution in the name of “Enjo Kosai” is in fashion among some high school girls. A mysterious man Kuni lament such girls but cannot deny a strong desire for them. He punish the girls by having sex with them without paying them. He calls this operation “Stop the Bitch Campaign” for public justice. Working in a sex trade shop where abnormal people are satisfied with their lust. Aoi tries to find out the man who raped her desperately in the past. One day, Aoi meets Kuni. The battle between a violent but beautiful girl and an abnormal dirty man is set to start again !

Apparently they cast Japanese porn stars as the heroine and this movie only part 2 of the Stop the Bitch Campaign trilogy. I am officially obsessed. If anyone knows where I can get a hold of a copy, please please please email me.

Read more about the film (and see the trailer!) here.

Gawker post references Percy Shelley, I nerd out.

2009-03-28T22:28:00.003-04:00

Gawker, a media blog that is a little too biting for it's own good sometimes, had an wonderful post today comparing the recession's impact on real estate development and the Percy Bysshe Shelley's poem "Ozymandias." Post like these prove that my past major is not so irrelevant, but it still won't get me a job, or into Dubailand.

Read the full post here.

Sean Penn, Benicio Del Toro, and Jim Carrey to star in the Three Stooges movie

2009-03-26T00:28:00.005-04:00

Word just got out that it's been confirmed that Sean Penn, fresh off his Oscar victory lap and James Franco's lap, will play Larry to Jim Carrey's Curly and Benicio Del Toro's Moe in the new Three Stooges movie.

Although I love the Three Stooges, Penn, Carrey, and Del Toro, I don't think this movie is gonna fly and I don't want to see it, much like this movie. I'm not really sure what Penn and Del Toro are doing in a Farrelly Bros movie, but it'll be interesting to see what kind of comedy they can come up with, especially since 21 Grams had me rolling on the floor.

Read the Gawker post here.

I am very afraid of John Katehis

2009-03-26T00:11:00.003-04:00

Last Friday ABC News Radio reporter Dan Weber was murdered at his home in Carroll Gardens, Brooklyn. He had been stabbed a dozen times and was bound with duct-tape. The suspect, 16-year-old John Katehis, apparently answered a craigslist ad for rough sex. According to his myspace page, which has been removed, he is very interested in buying swords, Anarchy, and violence. But what really creeps me out is the picture above.

Gawker has a screenshot of the removed profile, which can be viewed here.

Read the New York Post article here.

MTA: More Train Aggravation

2009-03-25T23:29:00.008-04:00

It looks like I'm one stop closer to moving back in with my parents and carpooling with my dad. Today the Metropolitan Transit Authority voted for staggering fare hikes on all fronts of transportation and service cuts.

City Room blogs, "Board members called the combination of fare increases and slashing bus, subway and commuter rail cuts a disaster but said they could no longer wait for lawmakers in Albany to rescue them." Love the disclaimer because clearly we all thought you idiots think this is a great idea.

Here's a run-down on how our morning and evening commutes will increase in sucking:

The LIRR's service to Belmont ends in late April.
Subway and bus fares would go up on May 31.
- Single rides would go from $2 to $2.50—a 25% hike;
- 7-day unlimited cards would be $31 (currently $25)—a 24% hike;
- 14-day unlimited cards would be $59 (currently $47)—a 25% hike;
- 30-day unlimited card would be $103 (currently $81)—a 27% hike;
- 7-day express bus cards would be $51 (currently $41)—a 24% hike;
- Pay-per-ride Metrocard bonuses are kept intact (though what the final bonuses are is still undetermined)
Metro-North and LIRR fares will go up about 23% on June 1.
Bridge and tunnel tolls increase in July.
City bus routes are eliminated over the summer; the W and Z lines are eliminated in the fall as the M and G service is cut.

Because the G train isn't shitty enough already. Read the full City Room blog here.

I'm going for a walk, which is still free.

Team Japan Wins World Baseball Classic, Confirms Theory that Ichiro is Baseball God

2009-03-24T23:18:00.004-04:00

Japan has won the World Baseball Classic for the second time, partially because their players are talented and very disciplined, and also because they had Ichiro Suzuki, who knocked in the winning runs after Korea tied it in the 9th inning. I didn't get to see the final game because I only get 5 channels on my TV and ESPN isn't one of them, but I heard it was a great game.

In other news, Daisuke Matsuzaka won the World Classic MVP again, and he sucks.

Read the full article here.

See the highlights here.

No longer a Virgin, but Forever 21.

2009-03-24T23:00:00.004-04:00

News broke a few days ago that the Virgin Megastores in Times Square and Union Square will officially shut down this month, along with all the other Virgin Megastores in the US that scheduled to shut down by June. This would be very bad news had it not been for P2P file sharing and iTunes, which with their easy, cheap, and sometimes free access to music destroyed the romance of flipping through aisles of CDs and DVDs.

Virgin used to be the place to find deals on classic albums and huge selections of virtually every genre of music, like an aircraft carrier version of Tower Records. Now only a few chain stores and a handful of independently owned record shops are left in the city, but at the rate we're going they too will perish.

The Times Square location will be reincarnated into a Forever 21, which is way better than Walmart, but still not as cool as Virgin. The Union Square location, however, still needs to find a new tenant and with Circuit City moving out as well, there is going to be a hell of a large space to fill.

I finally caught Saturday Night Fever

2009-03-23T21:09:00.007-04:00

It's really hard to believe that I've lived 24 years of my life and never seen Saturday Night Fever, a zeitgeist of 1970s American cinema and a cultural phenomenon that launched disco into a mania and changed the conventions of film musicals. I was inspired to see this film after my advertising teacher went off on a tangent for half an hour on what a great movie it is, and boy was he right.

This film portrays a young Brooklynite frustrated with his life - his dysfunctional family, his deadbeat friends, and his dead-end job. Naturally, the only salvation he has is dancing, and every weekend he spends all the money he earns dancing and partying the night away at a local club. It is the only way he can escape his miserable life, if only for one night a week.

He then sees how far his passion can take him by entering a dance contest, and begins practicing with a young woman he's in love with. But just as he is fighting to escape his life, she is also looking for a exit, as she dismisses his lifestyle, and all of Brooklyn, for a more glamorous and prospective life in Manhattan.

The young man, Tony, is played wonderfully by John Travolta before he got weird. He portrays his character as a punky, racist, sexist asshole who's so insecure that from the first few scenes you immediately fall for him. Nothing makes you hate Tony and feel sorry for him more than when he blows up in front of his mother at dinner - as he belts out his anger, frustration, and restlessness, only to see how much he's hurt someone he loves.

And the dancing... I never thought disco was cool until last night. I never thought John Travolta was cool until last night. This film has some of the most intense and entertaining dance sequences I've ever seen.

What I also find very interesting about this movie is that every stereotype of the late 1970s can be found - hairstyles, clothes, music, even the subway. The New York City that they live in seems far removed from ours (you can smoke anywhere, and there are no cell phones), yet oddly it still hits home, perhaps because the Verrazano Bridge is still just as ugly, or maybe, and perhaps more importantly, because the overarching themes of restless youth is still relevant today and always will be.

Below is probably the most bad ass dance scene in the movie.

Turning red when drinking will kill you more than once

2009-03-22T15:10:00.003-04:00

According to a new study alcohol is bad for you. Not just because it destroys your liver, heart, stomach, brain, social life, motor skills, and sex drive, but also because it may also give me esophageal cancer.

The new study shows that consuming alcohol without a special enzyme in your liver that helps break down the chemicals (resulting in flushed skin, otherwise known as "chink pink") can result in cancer in your esophagus, or as I call it, food tube.

This sounds like pretty bad news, especially because I spent more money per week on alcohol than on food, and also because when I drink I turn martian red and people make fun of me. I guess this just another reason why I drink.

read the full article here.

And while we're at it...

2009-03-19T16:51:00.004-04:00

This is another reason why I don't like the Jonas Brothers.

That's Joe Jonas, in a zebra print tank

On the other hand, this is pretty funny, especially since the Jonas Brothers don't seem to realize that they are being mocked.

Hipsters can be racist for a mere $75

2009-03-18T22:19:00.007-04:00

Inspired by the Spanish Basketball Team

This is friggin' ridiculous. There is a website which advertise eyewear with thin slitted holes called "slanties." Although the glasses are inspired by inuit eyewear that originates 2,000 years ago, entrepreneural hipsters have lovingly named it after a racist stereotype. Now you can join Miley Cyrus, Amy Sedaris, and every Latin sports club in doing the chinky-eye without even lifting a finger. And best of all you can own a pair for only $75! And they'll last 800 years, which is awesome because stupidity is timeless.

If you are as enraged as I am you can give these hipsters a piece of your mind at info@slanties.com

Natasha Richardson is dead

2009-03-18T21:55:00.004-04:00

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw the New York Times obituary. Two days ago she was enjoying a ski vacation in Quebec, Canada. After falling on what was described as "a patch of snow" while taking beginner's ski lessons, she injured her head, causing hemorrhaging between her brain and her skull. Although she initially shook off her fall, she complained an hour later of severe headache and was rushed to Lenox Hill Hospital yesterday, where she died.

She was a brilliant stage and film actress, earning a Tony or her role as Sally Bowles in Cabaret. She was part o the great Redgrave theater dynasty. She married Liam Neeson, another great performer of our time. Let's hope her next life is just as illustrious as this one.

Read the New York Times obituary here.

And also, Andy Samberg

2009-03-17T19:30:00.003-04:00

While I'm posting videos of SNL skits, I might as well pay tribute to rising star Andy Samberg, whose music videos play on repeat on my iPod. Hopefully in the next year he too will become just as popular as these guys. Congrats to Andy for scoring a hosting gig for the MTV Movie Awards which I might actually watch despite much of the viewers being teenage girls.

Tracy Morgan on SNL

2009-03-17T19:11:00.004-04:00

This weekend's Saturday Night Live was probably the first I watched on a Saturday night in years, all because Tracy Morgan, the godfather of my pet giraffes, is hosting. His absurd statements, loud voice, and spaced out facial expressions can make anything sound funny. Just check this out.

He was rocking and rolling and forgot a few lines that night but it all made the show better and, believe it or not, funny. Below are some of my favorite clips from last week. Enjoy!

The Cold Opening

"I know what stem cells are..."

Tracy and Keenan from Goodburger

And my favorite, Brian Fellows

Museums now hoping cheapskates still come see art.

2009-03-17T18:53:00.005-04:00

Gothamist had a post yesterday that said the MET and other city museums are relying on people who don't pay the full recommended admission because the recession makes people cheap. I actually think that they're not paying full admission because $20 suggested donation is friggin' greedy. I'm sure that if the admission charge was mandatory the MET would be in financial turmoil because the average guy isn't gonna blow $20 to get his art fix, or to take his family of 4 and spend $80.

I'm not sure why this is newsworthy, because I don't know anyone who frequents the museum and pays full price each time. Call me crazy/cheap/collegestudent, but one reason why the MET is so wonderful is because I can get in for less than the subway ride there. Another reason is their Vermeer collection, which I can see for less than a subway ride.

Read the full article here.

Menkui-Tei

2009-03-14T22:36:00.003-04:00

The last ramen shop I stopped at before I started blogging about them was Menkui-Tei, centrally located at St. Mark's Place. This was my last stop because A. I remembered their ramen being very mediocre, B. I didn't know if I should consider this a ramen place, and C. I was gonna go but then a friend invited me to dinner at Setagaya.

I went in and sat down by the counter which faced a white wall rather than the kitchen. As a matter of fact the kitchen was nowhere to be seen. Unlike the other restaurants which are in bar form Menkui-Tei is a normal restaurant. I looked around the boring dining room which reeked of cleaning detergent, spotting hand-written specials all over the walls. I gazed at all of them and then settled on the Kyushu Ramen, the restaurant's take on "authentic southern ramen."

I was totally lost on the soup. Everything seemed to fade away except for me and my bowl. The broth, made of pork bones, was a perfect blend of flavors, savory and garlicky, and thick like milk. Dare I say that the broth is richer than Momofuku and Ippudo, and risk chastisement from foodies across the blogosphere. I have to say that a place like this, with their plain white walls, doesn't mess around. They may have missed their mark on a few dishes but they clobbered it with this dish.

It seemed like everything about this soup was wonderful. The noodles were chewy and tender and carries the soup well. The roast pork, juicy and tender, was bursting with flavor and had just the right amount of fat to keep me happy while not crippling me with heart problems. And the soft-boiled egg, with its runny yoke, compliments the entire bowl. As I was coming down from my food ecstasy I heard R. Kelly's remix to "Ignition," playing on the radio, which sobered me up and kind of grossed me out a little. But this place, despite its lack of aesthetics, has been reborn in my eyes.

Menkui-Tei

63 Cooper Square

(212) 228-4152

Average Bowl: $10

Cash Only

Rai Rai Ken

2009-03-13T11:15:00.008-04:00

Walking into Rai Rai Ken is probably the only time you'll be able to move your legs and arms simultaniously until after you leave. The quaint ramen den is narrow and small, and has poor fatass-ability. There are only 10 seats around the bar, so those who don't come at just the right time have to wait outside in the cold for someone to wiggle his way out. The counter and trimmings are all made of wood and the stools are reminiscent of old-school diners. the walls are papered with Japanese newspaper which only adds more character to the place.

I grabbed the last seat at the place, and sitting down gave me an interesting perspective of the restaurant, mainy because I was so low and the chef, who was standing, towered over me an everybody else. I peeked at the menu and ordered the shio ramen, which came in no time.

The noodles were very chewy but otherwise was pretty mediocre. The broth, the "house special seafood based noodle soup" was thin and lighter than most broths but the spinach gave it a nice, unique touch and the scallions really bring it home.

The roast pork is tasty but a bit dry, almost like a pot roast. Other ingredients like the menma, fish cake, and dried seaweed all add a little bit to the flavor and texture, but unfortunately the hard-boiled egg destroys the texture, as the yoke is way too well done and grainy.

All things considered, Rai Rai Ken is only an average place from a ton of other options. What makes it enjoyable, besides watching people squeeze through the restaurant, is the price, as most dishes are under $10. It's also open really late so if you get the munchies you can always swing by and bury your head in the soup with all the other drunks/stoners/night shift people.

Rai Rai Ken

214 E 10th St (between 1st Ave and 2nd Ave)

(212) 477-7030

Average Bowl: $9

Cash Only

Ramen Setagaya

2009-03-12T22:39:00.005-04:00

This place opened up right before my lease to my East Village apartment expired. From what I recall at its grand opening there were lines out the door with hungry souls. I never got a chance to try it until a few weeks ago, and unfortunately the food did not live up to my expectation, or at least the Chashu Ramen didn't, which is not a good sign because the waitress recommended it as the house special.

Let's start with the noodles. Although not very tender and chewy it does lock in the flavor of the soup. Unfortunately, they look a little too much like Cup Noodle ramen, and is overall only slightly better than the spaghetti they serve at Minca Ramen Factory. The seafood broth, a nice digression from the more popular tonkatsu and miso variety, is very thin and has a pleasant (not overpowering) aftertaste.

What really saves this soup are the soft-boiled egg and the pork. The egg is extremely fresh and compliments the soup very well and also makes the noodles more interesting when mixed in. The chinese style roast pork hits its marks, being juicy and tender, and everything a good charsiu roasted pork should be, but also because they serve you copious amounts - 3 slices!!

Alas, after dining in two fine ramen establishments only a week prior, I was let down by Ramen Setagaya. Perhaps I expected too much? Did my observations at the grand opening pull a shade of falsehood over my eyes? Or was it just that I didn't care for the chashu ramen? I don't know, but if you would like to try it out you can't miss the place with it's glass facade and big green letters. There is a bar where you can sit and watch the chefs in action or you may opt for the big wooden tables towards the front of the restaurant, where you'll have a perfect view of Japanese food programming on TV.

Ramen Setagaya

141 1st Ave (between 9th St and St. Mark's Place)

(212) 529-4750

Average bowl: $11

Cash Only

Momofuku Noodle Bar

2009-03-11T20:37:00.005-04:00

Momofuku Noodle Bar is by far the most popular ramen joint in the city. David Chang's ramen palace has customers lining up out the door, waiting not only for the awesome noodle soups, but also for pork buns, dumplings, fried chicken, and other goodies. But a true jedi craves not these things.

I was seated at the bar and read the menu off the chalkboard before deciding on the Momufuku ramen, which features the usual fish cake, seaweed, scallion, and menma, and unique items like a poached egg and the "pork combination" of Charsiu (roast pork) and berkshire pork. The jaded waiter took my order emmotionlessly and in a few minutes I got my bowl.

The noodles where probably the best I've had, being tender, chewy, and able to hold the flavor of the broth, which was delicate with a great balance of between the pork and onion flavors. the poached egg on top makes the soup creamy and delicious. The menma provides a smokey flavor that adds a nice finish to a well-made broth.

The pork slices are succulent and juicy, melting in your mouth into savory goodness. They may just be a little bit better than the slices at Ippudo NY, and you know how much I love that place. My only complaint is that it's really fatty and reminds me of the bacony slices at Minca Ramen Factory, but if you're okay with adding another belt hole then no worries.

what is a great bowl of ramen is somewhat held back by two factors. One being the high price ($16 for the damn bowl) and the other being the strange set-up: a long narrow corridor where the bar is, then a kitchen with a few small tables in the back. Basically you're going down a mine shaft. The light-lacquered wooden furniture are pretty to look at but are also uncomfortable to sit on. Otherwise, a good choice all around.

Momofuku Noodle Bar

171 1st Ave (Between 10th st and 11th st)

(212) 475-7899

Average bowl: $14

Credit Cards Accepted

www.momofuku.com

Ippudo NY

2009-03-10T23:35:00.005-04:00

Sigh

The ramen house that's all was all the rage when it open last spring seems to live up to the hype, which can be both delightful and dreadful. When I peeked into the restaurant at around 7pm on a Wednesday there was already a line out the door and if it wasn't for my determination I would have gone elsewhere.

When I finally got a table at the bar I was pretty hungry and ready for some hot, steamy ramen action. I ordered the Akamaru Modern, a tonkatsu soup that's made with miso paste, garlic oil, and pork bones. It the best dish in the house according to my non-Japanese waitress and while passing my menu back to her looked around to find that about 3/4 of the people in the restaurant, including the chefs, were not Asian.

Although I'm not so elitist to judge a dish's authenticity on the ethnicity of the chef, this observation did make me wonder about the international appeal of ramen and the type of clientele that Ippudo NY, part of a chain restaurant in Japan, is attracting.

I don't really remember what I thought about next because the food came and Oh My God there was a party in my mouth for like 15 minutes. Let me start off with the noodles, which is the weakest part of the dish. And by weakest I mean they were al dente, chewy, they held the soup well, but was a bit too thin for my taste (although I prefer this to most ramen noodles).

The broth was delicious. Subtle and refined in taste and just a tad savory, which the noodles held together wonderfully. The berkshire pork, praised for its lucious flavor, melts in your mouth and makes you glad you're alive. Along with the ensemble cast, which includes crunchy cabbage, onions, kikurage, and scallions, makes the bowl a pantheon of flavor.

As you can tell I really liked this place. The ambience is very stylish, sleek, and a bit pretentious, clearing catering to a more upscale crowd. The great thing is that the bar makes it possible to see the entire kitchen so you can study the life cycle of ramen while you wait for your food. And of $13 a bowl, it's a pretty good deal.

Ippudo NY

65 4th Ave (between 10th St and 9th St)

(212) 388-0088

Average bowl: $13

Credit Cards Accepted

http://www.ippudo.com/ny/

Minca Ramen Factory

2009-03-09T22:45:00.004-04:00

I had my first bowl of ramen in New York at Minca Ramen Factory, and although there are many places in the East Village that do a better tonkatsu (pork broth) ramen than this place, it is still my go-to when I'm in the mood. I guess this is because that it's all the way out on 5th street between Ave A and Ave B so I don't have to wait too long for a seat, and because I used to live right across the street from it and it provided me with sustenance 3 nights a week.

The restaurant is a cute little hole in the wall with wooden tables and brick walls decorated with paintings of little people. Sitting at the bar lets you peak over to the kitchen, where you see everyone hard at work putting together savory dishes.

I ordered the miso ramen, their bestseller, and waited patiently as they composed it. When it arrive in front of me I noticed two things - the smell was amazing, and that they changed their noodles. The signature of this place was that they had thick tender noodles that almost resembled soba which set themselves apart from the rest. Unfortunately, it's not available unless you ask for it.

The new noodles were less chewy and doesn't really hold the flavor of the soup well. That is a shame because the soup is wonderfully hearty and very filling. The other goodies include bean sprouts that ad crunchiness, sweet onions, corn, menma (bamboo shoots) , seaweed, and if the soup wasn't heavy enough for you already, half of a hard-boiled egg.

To top all that off, 2 thick slices of pork loin rest on top of the noodles looking pretty, tender, and about as fatty as a Big Mac.

For $11 the price is about right. Overall this place is a good for a quick dinner, especially if you're hungry. You can't really go wrong with anything on the menu, but just remember to order yours with their special noodles.

Minca Ramen Factory

536 E. 5th Street (between Ave A/Ave B)

(212) 505-8001

Average bowl: $10

Cash Only

I am the lord of ramen

2009-03-08T21:14:00.008-04:00

I've realized that over the past few years that ramen shops have proliferated all over Manhattan. No, not the one that comes in a styrofoam cup which you add hot water to and then consume when you're poor/drunk, but the actual noodle soup that the college staple is based on. I'm not sure why of all things ramen was blessed with this fortune, but being that I love love love noodle soup I'm not complaining. Ramen, like a good bowl of pho, wonton soup, and kalbi tang, is wonderful from the first slurp to the last.

So it recently got into my mind that I should start reviewing all the ramen shops in Manhattan and try to find out who has the best soup, most tender noodles, most flavorful goodies, and the most appropriate decor. But then I got lazy and only ended up reviewing the ramen shops in the East Village.

Over the next week or so I'll be posting my reviews for some of my favorite places, hopefully providing some insight if you ever find yourself craving noodle soup in the East Village.

Hope your hungry!

A delicious meal.

A depressing meal.

Chinese good at team sports, Bernie Williams is back

2009-03-07T13:43:00.004-05:00

I didn't actually realize that opening day for the 2009 Baseball season is less than a month away which means I only have a few weeks or so to get things done before I marry myself to the Yankees' schedule until the fall.

But I also didn't notice that the World Baseball Classic is going on and shit is going down all over the world. The last tournament was a bit of a bust with both Team USA and China leaving after the first round. Predictably, the championship game was played between Japan, who gave us Ichiro, and Cuba, who birthed El Duque.

But as we speak, the Dutch team is leading the Dominican team for a chance to advance in the second round - The Dutch. Is baseball even popular in Holland? And if so how the hell can they beat a team from a country obsessed with the sport? This is like when Team USA beat Portugal in the quarterfinals of the 2002 World Cup.

Bernie Williams is back with a bat in his hands playing for Puerto Rico. the 40-year-old got dumped like yesterday's garbage by the team that he devoted 11 years of his life to, but now has a second life playing in an international stage. Quite a step up I must say.

Across the lake in Tokyo, Team Japan made goofballs of Team Korea with a 14-2 win. Although I don't really care much about this game I am glad that Dice-K got roughed up in the first inning when someone hit a monster home run against him.

But I think the big news of the day is China defeating Taiwan and knocking them out of the tournament. Politics aside, Taiwan's baseball program is far superior to China's, which is virtually nonexistent. Baseball never really caught on in China until recently, and the fact that they defeated Taiwan after not winning a single game in the last WBC is Ka-RAZY.

The Chinese team is mostly made up of Chinese players, but there is one player who, though ethnically Chinese, was born in USA and plays in the Pittsburgh Pirates' minor league system. An ABC! Just like me! His name is Ray Chang and he homered and drove in 2 runs en route to a 4-1 victory.

Read about Ray Chang (and watch the highlights) here.

Conde Nast/Publishing is screwed

2009-03-06T11:33:00.004-05:00

Conde Nast CEO Nick Townsend said in a memo yesterday that difficult decisions will be made in the near future. You know what that means - massive layoffs and cost cutting efforts for the publishing giant, a company that glamorized publishing and made it sexy to take a $28k starting salary in hope that a few years down the line you'll become a senior editor or an ad sales person with several big name accounts.

Well now Conde Nast is falling down a deep well, and things better start getting great by the summer if they want to save their asses. Just read this doomsday post on Gawker! And there's no doubt that if Conde Nast collapses the rest of publishing will soon follow.

Reckless Sons

2009-03-06T11:15:00.004-05:00

Yesterday night I somehow ended up at a party hosted by John Varvatos in the old CBGB location. I find it comically predictable that what was once an underground, low-brow venue for the punk movement, a symbol of grungy, sweaty counterculture, has turned into a high-end luxury clothing store.

Nevertheless, I got really into the band that was playing on stage, and for a few moments it looks as though the old CBGB has risen from the ashes like a golden phoenix, except this time the band was performing to a bunch of yuppies in dress shirts.

Check out The Reckless Sons here.

"A man's most valuable possession is a obedient woman"

2009-03-06T11:05:00.005-05:00

That's what my fortune cookie fortune said yesterday after a meal at a local Chinese restaurant. You have to appreciate the frankness of the fortune, as most guys wait until after a few meals with their dates to start thinking like this.

Once again, Asians take a step backwards.

One Delicious Taco

2009-03-04T23:02:00.004-05:00

Anyone who has said more than a few sentences to me in the last few weeks knows that my new obsession right now is Flight of the Conchords. A show about two hapless New Zealanders who try to break into the New York music scene, the two protagonists, Jermaine and Bret, ponder truth, justice, and the American way with the help of their clueless band manager and musical numbers. Although the humor is silly at times I love how it mocks hipsterism and conventional television shows. and this song is pretty funny too.

But this past episode which featured Bret singing karaoke was like having my favorite things wrapped up in one delicious taco. I don't know how you guys roll, but when I sing karaoke with friends, somehow we end up picking the weirdest Asian music to sing. I think the clip below pretty much summarizes the experience (sans alcohol and James Tai).

Go see TOKYO! now!

2009-03-03T20:25:00.004-05:00

One of the perks about being a film intern is that I get to see privately screened movies and hang out with a-list people. Yesterday I got the chance to catch Michel Gondry/Leos Carax/Bong Joon-Ho's latest film, Tokyo!, which premiered at the New York Film Festival a few months back (the wanted me to usher, which I thought meant dancing). The film, which opens on Friday in New York is a compilation of short films by each director, touching on different aspects of Tokyo life like self-worth, xenophobia, and aloofness.

Afterwards there was a reception and I got to shake David Cross's hand, which I will never wash again.

Read a much better analysis of the films here.

And... we're back!

2009-03-03T20:20:00.003-05:00

Sorry for the absence of my wit this past week and a half. I was busy helping out with Japan Society's film series, Shinjuku Ecstasy, which was very tiring and a tad stressful, but probably nowhere near as much work as this. Anyway, now that that's over and done with I can more time to do my two favorite things in the world - being myself and blogging about it.

This is Why You're Fat

2009-02-22T12:03:00.004-05:00

WARNING: Don't read this post if you are hung over or stoned.

Cruising the internetz is one of my favorite past times, and recently I stumbled over a site called This is Why You're Fat, which has a collection of photos and ingredients of high-fat/cholesterol food that so aptly symbolizes American gluttony. I first saw the dishes on this site and wanted to throw up, but now that it's noon and I haven't had breakfast or lunch yet, they don't look half bad.

Bacon Cheese Pizza Burger

Bacon Poutine

Bacon Wrapped Meatloaf with a layer of mac and cheese

The Thurmanator

See more heart attack inducing foods here.

Film Review: Milk

2009-02-22T11:14:00.003-05:00

Last Tuesday I got the chance to see Milk, which is nominated for several Academy Awards, including best picture. However, although there are many things that I like about this film I'm not sure if it deserves to be honored as a best picture nominee (but then again Benjamin Button got nominated). The problem that plagues all biographical movies is that creativity is limited to the events that the film portrays, and even though a film is allowed to make alterations to the events for dramatic purposes, too much change questions the validity of the movie.

That said, there is no doubt that Harvey Milk was a great man who did not just fight for gay rights but also the rights of many margins of America's population. His work resonated throughout the disabled, the elderly, and ethnic minorities as well. Perhaps Proposition 8 undermined everything that Milk achieved.

Sean Penn plays Milk beautifully, giving him many layers and dimensions of character. His supporting cast also delivered, capturing the frustrations and euphoria that came with Milk's setbacks and accomplishments. However, as far as the film goes, I don't see anything special about it that would elevate it to best picture category. The story ran linear and without an interesting perspective, merely showing events as they happen. A few mirror/reflection shots were interesting but aside from those the director, Gus Van Sant, didn't do anything more daring, which is a shame given that he's Gus Van Sant.

One aspect of the film that worked very well, however, is that many people know the fate of Harvey Milk (he was murdered in office). That said, there were constant death threats towards him in the film and as the movie progressed each one seemed more nefarious than the next. This was very effective in the build up to an horribly unexciting climax, one that nearly makes you wish Gus Van Sant altered, event if it means jeopardizing the validity of the picture.

Obama as Sushi

2009-02-21T12:30:00.002-05:00

Stimulating

Oh man, this makes me patriotic and hungry. In Japan, there is a sushi den that has a dish called the Obama Roll, which is, as presumed, sushi that looks like President Obama.

See the post here.

I'm gonna go, um, eat my sandwich.

The worst internship ever

2009-02-21T12:17:00.003-05:00

Nevermind that the poster for this ad clearly hates girls, but the tone of voice gives us a good example what a horrible boss he/she is. My favorite part is the opening line Wanted: Eager young man (or emotionally stable woman)"

I'm not sure who out there in the indentured servants pool would consider themselves emotionally unstable. Perhaps this company wants to bypass the whole interviewing process of employment altogether and just select people right off of craigslist, which in that case it makes for endless material for comedians.

Read it all here.

Why I'm Not In Advertising

2009-02-21T12:03:00.005-05:00

Women as pieces of meat, brilliant....

Everything I hate about advertisements is pretty much summed up in one delicious non-fat blog post. Commercials that make you stupid, racist promotions, sexism, and bad ad placement are all here.

I'm also not in advertising because my ideas suck, but thats a whole other post.

War is Funny

2009-02-20T11:32:00.007-05:00

For the preservation of our bodily fluids!

I found this post in Jossip and thought it to be very relevant, at least for me, who is working crazy long hours making sure Japan Society's film series, Shinjuku Ecstasy, runs smoothly like butter down a woman's breasts...

Anyway, the post basically sez that with the upcoming release of Inglourious Basterds, it must noted that these days there are not very many films that finds humor in war. Sure, there is always an element of comedy in even to most somber of war films (Saving Private Ryan seemed to have timed them perfectly with a soldier's death) but a film about war that is meant to be funny hasn't been produced in a really long time.

This shift in attitude brings up the issue of public perception of war as comedy, and comedy in general. Besides the absence of humorous war films there are also no films that finds humor in racism quite like Blazin' Saddles.

Read the full post here.

Lindsay Lohan wants Yoo!

2009-02-19T18:56:00.005-05:00

Great American Icon Lindsay Lohan will star in a new movie to be released later this year called Labor Pains, which is either about pregnancy or being an intern. I've never watched Mean Girls and Freaky Friday was a bit snoozy, but I'll probably at least follow up with this film on imdb because of one reason only - apparently Aaron Yoo plays her boyfriend. That's right, an Asian dude as Lindsay's man. No longer are trashy white girls exclusively for football jocks and coke junkies. Aaron Yoo is breaking a color barrier and he's doing it in style. Just check out this photo spread of him n Complex Magazine.

I kissed a girl and I liked it!

Protect your children from the crying paddy goose!

2009-02-17T22:11:00.003-05:00

Chinese people love them some Internet, which is why despite heavy censorship efforts by their government, and the virtual erection (oh grow up!) of the "Great Firewall of China," Internet junkies in the Middle Kingdom have found ways around the firewall and give the CCP a big ol' middle finger.

Since their government have got their undies tied in a knot about sites like wikipedia, which contains negative criticism of the party (by bored people, a totally creditable source), and have blocked the site in China, a popular Chinese website called Baidu has created its own interactive, user-editable encyclopedia for people who want to know who Charlemagne is, or what hurricane smashed Louisiana in 2004.

However, it wasn't long before immature cyberpunks starting posting bogus entries, sending Baidu's administrators into fits of rage. The latest hoax posting is called The Ten Legendary Beasts of Baidu, an entry about fictitious animals whose names are homonyms or puns of curse words. Very childish, but nevertheless amusing. My favorite animal is the crying paddy goose (吟稻雁） a bird that appeared in the Qing dynasty that swooped down and destroyed fields, leaving farmers and crops with a strange illness. it's also a pun for 阴道炎，or vaginitis.

You can read about the other 9 mythic animals here. And remember ladies, when there's a crying paddy goose diving into your field, get a rubber bag to catch it with.

Also, whoever wrote the Wei Guangzheng entry in at the bottom is a rock star.

Presidents' Day and the faces of our presidents

2009-02-16T12:03:00.002-05:00

Today is President's Day and one of the few glories of working for non-profits is that we get this day off to rest, relax, be patriotic, and blog.

Since the buzz of today seems to be the celebration of our past and present commander-in-chief, here's my two cents on images of Barack Obama and George W. Bush. Because let's face it, America voted for Bush because of his relaxed, buddy buddy demeanor and then for Barack Obama because the man looks so damn cool.

When Bush smiles, his warm, inviting look makes him look like a friend you can have a beer with

On the other hand, when Obama smiles, He looks really goofy.

When Bush gave press conferences, he looked dazed, confused, and clueless.

But when Obama makes a speech he looks ready to kick ass.

Now Boarding the Pain Train - My Ass

2009-02-16T00:09:00.004-05:00

This weekend I went snowboarding for the first time ever. I've only skied twice in my life and found that I can adapt very quickly to the whole ski and poles deal, but today snowboarding totally owned my ass. I fell on every part of my body and ran into at least 5 people. Needless to say, I'm not doing this again, because I'm not good at it, and if you're not good a doing something, there's no point in doing it in the first place.

Anyway, I got pictures.

Barry getting ready to board down the bunny slope. Emily also came with us but she went off to her double black diamond trail. But that's okay because we fell a lot and falling down in front of girls is embarrassing...and dumb.

Trying to fly.

Getting ready to own the bunny slope.

Oh yeah...

This wasn't me falling. I was just resting after dominating the hill, honest.

The Intern Revolution has Begun!

2009-02-10T21:34:00.003-05:00

Since returning from my 10-month-long power hour in Asia I have had zero success finding work in this faltering economy. There has been a hiring ice age since last summer and no company is willing to take aboard another entitled punkass for $35k. This of course resulted in landing unpaid internships, which is essentially free labor in the name of vocational enrichment.

My grandparents came to this country in the 1950s, and my grandma's first job was a sewing factory in Chinatown that paid about a penny for every button she sewed. She brought about $5 a day. I on the other hand went to a 4-year university and make $4 a day for transit compensation. The times they are a-changing.

Well it looks like some interns up north have staged a bit of a revolution... or rather they are being further exploited. Metro Toronto has apparently laid off all its staff writers and replaced them with an army of unpaid interns. According to the article, "A few days before the layoffs, Metro management brought in the interns. The union representing the laid-off writers says the labour contract allows interns to stay in the event of layoffs."

hi-ho, hi-ho, it's off to write we go!

And there you have it, North America once again practices slavery.

For the full article click here.

Michael Cera is a little bitch

2009-02-10T11:13:00.003-05:00

After seducing me with his weird awkward personality in Superbad and the trailer for Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, Michael Cera's more candid side was revealed by Defamer, and boy is he a sensitive man, who's gives his heart to every movie but gets it stepped on every day. I'm still not sure if this is him actually flipping out or just an improve exercise, but either way it's very amusing, and apparently Chewbacca was on the set. Check it out:

A-Roids

2009-02-09T21:16:00.004-05:00

Merely a few days after Michael Mermaid Phelps was caught doing monster bong hits at a college party, Sports Illustrated published an article claiming that in 2003 Alex Rodriguez, the would be greatest baseball player of our era, partied a little bit himself... with steroids.

I don't think that steroids is that big of a deal (cheating goes on in every sport, and power enhancement is part of the game) but of course cheaters' reputations are tarnished once they're exposed as such. A-Rod was never my favorite player nor do I think he's the best player. He buckles under pressure and is too arrogant on and off the field. But as Joe Torre claims, he was the hardest-working player in baseball, putting in hours upon hours of training and effort into improving his game.

Today, he admitted that he used steroids from 2001-2003, and I have officially lost faith in him.

Who, me?

Beijing is Burning

2009-02-09T19:31:00.003-05:00

A building in the CCTV Tower complex is on fire. On the last day of the Chinese new year a stray fireworks rocket hit the nearly completed tower and set the entire thing on fire. Although the towers itself is not affected, the Mandarin Oriental Hotel is completely swallowed in flames.

The fire itself is a tragedy, but what makes this incident so incredibly horrifying is that this building complex, a symbol Olympic hype and the city's modernization, the biggest construction site in the world and a trademark in the newly defined Beijing skyline (which previously was nothing more than a few 3-4 story buildings) was destroyed in the biggest celebration in China by fireworks.

This problem would not have existed 50 years ago or even last year, when the tower was not even half built. China, even after the success of the Olympic Games, is in this very provocative and glaring moment, struggling with it's new image.

New Nabe

2009-02-09T11:42:00.003-05:00

I haven't updated in the past few days because I've been watching Flight of the Conchords nonstop over and over again and also because I spent most of the weekend packing. For what, you ask? Where am I going? Am I busting out of New York again to satiate my thirst for adventure? Did I skip town to return to Beijing for another round of expat prickness?

Nope. I packed up my bags and left the grungy palisades of Chelsea for the spectacular wonder of the Upper East Side - Home of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, The Dalton School, Bruno Jamais, and other institutions of high affluence. This is the place where the streets bleed with Americana and the people breathe the same air as the characters in Catcher in the Rye, Breakfast at Tiffany's, Harriet the Spy, and Gossip Girl.

All I need is a skin bleach and clothes from Ralph Lauren

My new place is on 90th St. between 2nd and 1st, but I probably won't have any sort of housewarming since my room is a converted closet and the entire apartment is the size of the storage room in my parents' house. My roommates, both Cali girls, have been here since last year so it's really nothing new for them. But when people ask me where I live from now on, I can say to them "I live on the Upper East Side," with a straight face.

High like Paper Planes

2009-02-06T15:50:00.003-05:00

Michael Phelps isn't the only one flying high in the sky. Over the last few days I've been wrangling with a fever that made me dream crazy. I couldn't believe the stuff I dreamt while in my invalid state. (we're talking stuff like being a donut or organizing a garbage festival). And if that wasn't enough, I've been tripping balls on nyquil and dayquil, turning my temporary visions into a 24 hour parade of illusions. It's hard to tell what is real anymore, like this, this, or this.

Speaking of flying, I just discovered a great show called Flight of the Conchords. You may laugh at me for just finding out about a show that's been around for a while, but keep in mind that all of last year I was doing this.

Alas, I couldn't score tickets to their concert, which went on sale today. ARGH. Back to dreaming about the garbage festival.

25 Things

2009-02-05T21:04:00.006-05:00

Recently my friends have been tagging me in Facebook notes with a similar title that looks something like "25 Things You Didn't Know About Me OMG Imso BOreD lol," following by a list of things about them that they would normally feel out of place talking about. Then there's a contract on the bottom that says to make your own list and tag 25 friends in in so that it will get passed around and around the Facebook universe.

I don't have anything against these chainmails, but I never get encouraged to do one because chances are that the friend who tagged me tagged all our mutual friends and if I wrote one and tagged all of them back I'd look like a tool. Also, it truly amazes me how a chainmail like this can get people to open up to their friends, sometimes revealing more than he/she would want us to know. I mean, I'm sure you're bored and it's a slow day at the office but writing 25 things about yourself takes a long time. I know for a fact that you don't work as a librarian so I'm wondering if it really is because you're bored at work or that this an attempt to draw attention to yourself.

What's also always interesting to observe is which one of your friends takes it most seriously and writes stuff that even his parents don't know. It's always a bit comical/embarrassing to read a criminal confession in a form of one of these, especially since everyone else wrote about how much they care about friends or what their favorite ice cream flavor is.

I can clearly see the natural urge to partake in this particular chain mail. One cannot help but to follow suit after reading his friend's tell-all, hoping that he too will score the same emotions from his peers as hs friend did with him. He wants to be understood just like his friend.

Joe Torre was so inspired he wrote an entire book on it!

UPDATE: The Washington Post also wrote about this, although the article (in the form of a list) drags on just a tad, just like most lists.

The Death of Variety Asia Online

2009-02-02T19:38:00.003-05:00

Having studied English literature in college rather than something useful, I have always found this current recession slightly irrelevant. Yes, I haven't secured a job or even a paid internship, but I expected that to happen during the first year or two after college. I pretty much subscribed myself to the thought that I will need to work extra hard to land a decent job.

With the layoff of a few close friends and my parents' businesses in danger of extreme cost-cutting, now it seems like the recession is this horrible blob that envelopes anything in its path and turns it to shit.

Variety Asia Online, one of my favorite websites for Asian media news and gossip, announced yesterday that it will be suspended indefinitely. This is big blow to me and other Asian film nerds, who looked to them for all our news and gossip.

Along with that, Kaiju Shakedown will cease to exist. The official blog of the website, it added color and humor to the stories it posted. I hope Grady Hendrix keeps it on as a hobby and updates it more frequently. However, with the New York Asian Film Festival coming up, it doesn't seem likely that he'll blogging.

So there it is. One of my favorite websites dead. I'm going to cry in the shower.

Film Review: Sweet Dream (Korea, 1936)

2009-02-01T22:29:00.001-05:00

I managed to catch the tail end of a film series that The Korea Society put on called "Korean Films Made During the Japanese Occupation." These films capture an extremely rare genre of cinema, even in Korea (these long-forgotten films were found in a Chinese warehouse a few years ago).

Sweet Dream takes place in contemporary Korea where a young woman named Aesoon leaves her husband and daughter to remarry an affluent man. Her husband is disgraced beyond control and her daughter cries every night, wishing she would come home. But as Aesoon soon finds out, her new man is a thief and she begins to plot his downfall, with horrific consequences.

The narrative, although today invokes a faint yawn, "left audience speechless" when it was release 70 years ago. The camera shots are not very interesting, and at times the lighting was off or annoying. But what really makes this film notable is its technological importance: it is the first feature film produced in Korea with sound.

However, their use of sound draws light on its own limitations. For example, periphery sound is mostly ignored, evident in many scenes that takes place outside (I have never seen children play so quietly in a playground). Furthermore, the actors' lines are woody and either recorded on the set (with white noise) or in a studio (sounding like a radio broadcast). More than once when the characters are shown sitting next to each other speaking it seems like they are yelling at each other from across the hall.

Perhaps this film is more suited as an academic/technical study of cinema rather than a form of entertainment. Especially considering what the film studios over in Tokyo and Shanghai were up to, it seems like given the current political climate at the time, budgets, and heavy censorship the producers were probably not allowed to go very far with this film, but still, this is a very interesting example of a place and time that I know very little about.

Michael Phelps loves him some wacky tabacky, Amy Sedaris hates her some Chinese people

2009-01-31T20:26:00.006-05:00

mmm....Scooby Snacks

Michael Dolphin Phelps, who accounted for over 20% of all gold medals won by the US during the Beijing Olympiad, was caught smoking dope out of a giant bong yesterday. His dear mother won't like this. Apparently this is not the first time he's gotten into trouble with marijuana.

Don't we all know this story all too well? I feel like I've seen it in movies before, you know, when someone gets really popular for their achievements, only to fall from grace by succumbing to drugs and other nasties. The only question is will Phelps redeem himself by having visions of his mom or playing at Folsom Prison?

In other news, Amy Sedaris, who is not as funny as her brother David, signed one of her books with a racist caricature of an Asian person and the words "Ching Chong." It's one thing to show your gratitude for your fans of color, but quite another to draw your humor from Rosie O'Donnell.

Joe Torre spitting fire and laying waste

2009-01-28T09:30:00.007-05:00

You suck!

This is a few days old but I find it amusing how its spiraling out of control.

Joe Torre, the former manager of the New York Yankees back when they won all those world series and then became the the team with the biggest payroll (and an all-star joke) in baseball will release a book next month called The Yankee Years where he reflects on the 11 years he spent at the Yankees organization.

Although he provides a plethora of anecdotes, some mundane and trivial, some with a "whaddya know!" twist, what seems to have sparked the interest of New York newspapers are his criticisms towards his teammates, particularly Alex Rodriguez.

According to his book, A-Rod is overly concerned with his image and his ego, constantly craving attention and caring more about how he looked, not getting the job done, during big moments of a game. I'm pretty sure anyone who has watch A-Rod during a playoff game already knows this, but what is perhaps more revealing is his idolization of Derek Jeter. A-Rod is described as having a "Single-White Female" syndrome with Derek Jeter, and has been labeled "A-Fraud" by some Yankees staff.

But it doesn't stop there. Torre apparently claims that when he was diagnosed with cancer a few years back, he got the news from George Steinbrenner and NOT his doctor. That is fucked up.

As his book turns into a crime-of-the-century like story in the sports world, more players are being named as damned by Joey T, namely Randy Johnson, Carl Pavano, and Kevin Brown, all of which I can't blame him for since they all sucked when they were on the Yankees. My favorite quote, however, is:

"The difference between Kevin Brown and David Wells is that both make your life miserable, but David Wells meant to."

Of course, many of these quotes were taken out of context, but for a man that preached loyalty among players and acted as a father figure for his teammates, he does leave himself open for criticism. And it seems like the New York papers are already jumping in on tearing the poor guy apart. Here are the headlines from the past few days:

TORRE RIPS 'A-FRAUD' & BOSS' BRASS BOZOS (NYP)

TORRE'S TRASHING CONTINUES (NYP)

REVOLTIN' JOE'S WHINE TURNS BITTER (NYP)

Joe Torre's poison pen in 'The Yankee Years' could be blot on career (DailyNews)

Bronx Bomber! Torre dishes Yankee dirt (DailyNews)

RIP John Updike, Silly photos of Hong Kong Stars

2009-01-28T00:32:00.001-05:00

Some very sad news today. John Updike, a giant among modern American writers, passed away. He was 76. My favorite story of his is "A&P," where a young man briefly lusts after a woman that he becomes infatuated with, only to end up with his yearning unfulfilled. Apparently, it's Richard's favorite too.

But alas it's still Chinese New Year and I can't talk about death for too long because it's inauspicious, so to cheer everyone up I'm posting these goofy pictures I found of Tony Leung Chiu-Wai, Maggie Cheung Man-yuk, and Anita Mui for a good laugh and look back at the 80s.

Enjoy!

Before talking to his soap Tony collected chili peppers.

Maggie touring the harbor...with latex gloves.

Anita thought she was a man.

see more pictures, which came from a sticker sheet, here.

Film Review: Riding Alone for a Thousand Miles

2009-01-26T20:20:00.000-05:00

A few days ago I ordered Riding Alone for A Thousand Miles on Netflix, partially because I was curious about the story, and also because it is directed by Zhang Yimou, who in the 1990s help bring mainland Chinese cinema into the world's eye before acting all goofy and making atrociously bad wuxia movies.

The plot concerns an old Japanese man from Hokkiado named Takata who learns that his son is gravely ill. Takata (played by Ken Takakura, known to us as Mastumoto in Black Rain and Uchiyama in Mr. Baseball), noticing that his son was in the middle of filming a documentary on a Yunnan Opera performer when he fell ill, decides to go to Yunnan, China to complete shooting his film. It is there that he find out that not only his son has the big C(ancer) but also that the performer he wants to film was arrested, conveniently/coincidentally for an assault related to his own son. Thus follows a supposedly humorous and heartwarming adventure to get the proper footage to please his son and explore father/son relationships.

The plot's novelty of a Japanese man in China quickly wears off and what was a fish-out-of-water scenario soon turns too annoying and pointless. It is one thing to portray a helpless person in an unfamiliar surrounding trying to achieve anything, but quite another for that helpless man to have a cellphone with a bilingual guide on speed dial. The latter takes away all urgency and frustration.

Translate for me or I'll cut you

And while we're at it, the bilingual guide who abandons the old man claiming that she doesn't have time to help him actually never leaves his sight, answering phone calls and taking requests even in the middle of the night. Doesn't sound very dire to me. Where's the threat of not being understood? Getting lost? Or *gasp* being cheated?

While the willingness of the guide does make the plot hard to believe, what makes this film a complete fraud is the sympathy of everyone around him. Zhang Yimou seems to think his audience is naive enough to believe that indomitable will and persistence can overcome even the tightest of governmental bureaucracy. And to believe that an entire village would throw a giant feast for a foreigner (and a Japanese foreigner to be precise) who is taking away a child from them is childishly optimistic.

The end of the film draws a parallel between Takata and the performer. Like the Takata, the performer hardly knows his son and when Takata shows him pictures of the boy laughing and playing he gets closure, which he reciprocates to Takata by performing the opera that his son was so infatuated with. Everyone seems to understand the importance of a father-son relationship, and completing his task, Takata goes back to Hokkiado.

Zhang weaves a story that really has nothing to offer except a plead for tears. All suspense and potential culture clashes are numbed by the increasing and spurious sympathy of the locals which makes the climax as unmoving as the rest of the film. Zhang should know better than to deliver a cheap shot like this to his fans and audiences.

恭喜发财！

2009-01-25T18:08:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone! It's only about 6pm here in New York but it's well past midnight over in China which means it's officially the Year of the Ox! w00t! w00t! Let's hear it for the ox!

In honor of this year's zodiac animal I'm reading Paul Bunyan stories, playing Oregon Trail, and visiting Lancaster, PA.

Time Out New York has a list of more relevant activities.

It's party time!

Happy Lunar New Year everyone! Eat lots of sweets, leave all the lights on in the house, and don't clean your room, wash your hair, or sweep anything (this is the only time of year my mom allows me to be a complete slob).

Celebrity Sighting: Matt Dillon

2009-01-25T01:54:00.000-05:00

I just saw Matt Dillon in Chinatown having dinner at Ping's on Mott Street. He's really tall and jacked. He was with non-celebrities that I'm sure has more meaning for him than he does for me.

LOLz!

Oscar nominees, Restaurant Week

2009-01-22T12:26:00.000-05:00

Today the nominations for the Academy Awards were announced and as expected, Benjamin Button and Heath Ledger are nominated. I used to get all excited about the Academy Awards but it really lost all credibility for me when Crash beat out Good Night and Good Luck, Munich, and Brokeback Mountain for Best Picture. That movie was perhaps one of the stupidest and most pretentious films of 2005 (Click here for A.O. Scott's review). Well, bygones aside, here are my thoughts on this year's picks.

Slumdog Millionaire: Probably considered the wild card in the Best Picture category, this movie was nominated for 10 statues and I hope it wins every one of them. Personally I hope R.A. Rahman wins for his music.

Best Actor: I haven't seen all the nominees but I really like Frank Langella.

Supporting Actor: will probably go to Heath Ledger, who deserves it. Yet, RD Jr.'s performance in Tropic Thunder was pure genius.

Best Actress: I actually haven't seen any of the movies of which these actresses were nominated for, although I hope Anne Hathaway wins (Short Hills pride! w00t w00t)

Best Supporting Actress: Penelope Cruz, hands down.

Best Director: Danny Boyle, oh please let it be Dany Boyle.

For the list of nominees, click here.

In other news, Restaurant Week started this week and my first stop on this budget/gourmet extravaganza was Tocqueville, a French/American fusion restaurant near Union Square (Tocqueville, French/American fusion, get it?). Aside for it's beautiful decor and waitstaff, their Restaurant Week menu was incredibly delicious. I recommend the chicken (melts in your mouth and in your heart) and the date cake.

Check out Tocqueville's menu here.

Dream

2009-01-19T10:12:00.001-05:00

Obamania

2009-01-18T15:10:00.000-05:00

The Reign Against Terror that is the Bush Jr. Presidency ends this Tuesday when President-Elect Barack Obama is sworn into office and New Yorkers will be dancing in the street. Almost every major media outlet will be covering this historic event, but it seems like 2 widely circulated magazine have stepped on each others' toes and printed basically the same cover on their current issue. I am, of course, talking about The Atlantic and Time Out New York.

Of course, these covers are very relevant to each publication. The Atlantic, with it's insightful culture and political commentary, has a fascinating article on race in America. Time Out New York, a popular events listing magazine, has an article on local inaugaration parties.

One contemplates...

...the other celebrates!

Holy Shit! There's a plane floating on the Hudson

2009-01-15T19:30:00.000-05:00

In case you haven't seen it on TV or gone online in the last few hours, A US Airways flight has crash landed into the icy Hudson River. The suspect of this disaster are apparently Al-Qaeda trained geese.

Somehow there were no deaths or serious injuries, although a few people were driven to hospitals for minor injuries. Big props to the pilot who didn't piss his pants and landed the plane safely in the water.

Read it all at Gothamist.

Awards!!! OMG Awards!

2009-01-13T15:06:00.000-05:00

I hope everyone got to see the Golden Globes on Sunday night and saw Underdog Millionaire rock the house with its wins in best picture, best director, best screenplay, and best original score. A.R. Rahman, one of the most gifted musicians in the world, gave a short and sweet acceptance speech, thanking “The one billion people of India” for his achievements.

Let’s hope the Oscars will show him the same love as the Foreign Press. Only a handful of Asians in the entertainment industry (m’boy Ang Lee) win Academy Awards so let hope that next year when Edison Chen’s directorial debut film gets nominated for best picture I’ll have A.R. Rahman to look to for hope.

Other amusing tidbits from that night were Tracy Morgan’s drunk acceptance speech when 30 Rock won best TV comedy, Tina Fey winning the award for awesomeness and admitting that she had all the Foreign Press action figures growing up, and a posthumous award win for Heath Ledger, whose death anniversary is in 9 days. I’m pretty sure this is to make up for getting snubbed with Brokeback Mountain.

Speaking of snubbed, Don Mattingly was not only denied Baseball Hall of Fame entry once again, but his votes dropped since last year. But at least Ricky Henderson got in. One of the best leadoff hitters of the game, he was one of the first players I admired.

On a side note, my fondest memory of Mr. Henderson was at a Mets game when a fan heckled at him and he (to no surprise) turned to the fan and blasted every four-letter word he knew – during an inning.

Now that is Hall of Fame sportsmanship.

In a world where the Criterion Collection actually considered films not made by Kurosawa or Godard

2009-01-10T01:19:00.000-05:00

Stay away from me, Chinese cinema.

Two reasons why I exist are Asian movies and the Criterion Collection. For those of you who don't know what I'm talking about, Asian countries have film industries that make movies that gives my eyes a sugar-rush and the Criterion Collection is a dvd label that touts itself as "a continuing series of important classic and contemporary films."

Usually a film with "the Criterion treatment" is $10-$20 more than a normal DVD but is loaded with special features (that's not interactive menus and previews), crystal-clear sound and image transfer, a well-written essay (or several) and a really fancy box (exhibit A).

Sadly, unless the film was helmed by a influential Japanese director or Wong Kar-Wai, Asian movies and the Criterion Collection don't really cross paths, and a lot of great Asian films from China, Korea, Thailand, India, etc get overlooked in favor of Samurai films and the French New Wave.

Then today I was skimming through Kaiju Shakedown (which unfortunately hasn't been the same since it's 9 month hiatus) and found out that folks in Asia go ape shit for Criterion dvds too. They love the Criterion Collection (or at least the covers) so much that a few netizens who have more free time than I do have created some faux-Criterion dvd covers for some of their favorite local movies. And believe it or not, they look friggin' awesome!

Let's have a look at Zhang Yimou, whose filmmaking skills over the years have aged like a fish lying around the kitchen in the heat of summer, and how the Criterion packaging could help boost his sales on Amazon.com.

1. The Road Home - Zhang Yimou's first collaboration with Zhang Ziyi, apparently "the star" of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon

Zhang Ziyi costars in this with Sun Honglei but you obviously can't tell by the cover.

Ditched the Asian font and decided to focus on an important prop in the story - genius.

2. The wonderfully shallow House of Flying Daggers, complemented with a dubious quote.

Who's holding the sword against Zhang Ziyi's neck?

Emphasizes a set piece from the coolest scene in the movie. Also totally intriguing

3. Hero, a movie I actually liked.

Of course, Zhang Ziyi gets a cover shot and not Tony Leung, Maggie Cheung, or Donnie Yen.

Classical Chinese - Classic

4. Curse of the Golden Flower, probably the worst movie I've ever seen.

Chow Yun-Fat as a skunk, Gong Li as a pair of giant breasts, and God knows what Jay Chou is doing.

With the yellow tint and Jay Chou's absence I actually kind of want to buy this movie.

5. Last, and probably Zhang's best, Raise the Red Lantern.

Is that Gong Li or a really young John Cho in drag?

Amazing type, emphasis on the red lanterns, if only it could happen...

view the entire gallery here.

Zhang Ziyi caught topless/rimmed

2009-01-08T09:30:00.000-05:00

I don't care much for Zhang Ziyi. She hasn't made a decent movie since 2046 and made me weep for humanity and Hollywood when she paraded around in a kimono in that homage to Asian stereotypes labeled Memoirs of a Geisha.

Therefore when I heard that there were photos of her sunbathing topless with her millionaire boyfriend I couldn't help but laugh. Then I saw the photos and it totally grossed me out. I mean, her boobies are nice (boobies generally are) and everything but really what is he looking for down there? Did he lose his watch or something?

mmm... Chrysanthemum

Could Zhang Ziyi, like Edison Chen, leave Asia out of shame and outrage? Will she be banned from making movies in China and blacklisted like Tang Wei? Or is this just a twisted way of promoting herself like Paris Hilton? My guess is all three.

Zhang Ziyi is furious over the leaked butt-munching photos. Chinese men are furious that her randy affair with a foreign man is so highly publicized. Chinese women are furious because they feel she is degrading Asian women. Perez Hilton is furious because he's getting sued for posting the photos on his website without permission.

There are a lot of different sites covering the scandal.

It's on Kaiju Shakedown

It's on The Shanghaiist

It's on The Blemish

It's all over Asian Newspapers like China Daily and The Straits Times

And it's the talk of the entire webnation of PRC.

and finally, all 81 photos (NSFW).

I was at the same dim sum restaurant as Time Out New York and they didn't even say hi

2009-01-07T02:17:00.000-05:00

Hi Everyone! Are we all out of our New Year hangover and pleasantly typing away at work? I know I am and man does it suck. Not my internship, that's alright. I mean the fact that I have to be at work again. every day. for 9 hours.

Haven't done much this year so far, although I did manage to participate in a Chinese food battle royale(Dim Sum) last Sunday at Jing Fong which was quite amusing/stressful. Jing Fong of Manhattan's Chinatown is perhaps the biggest restaurant in the world. Seriously, this place could have been a race track or a indoor football field if it weren't for all the tables and chairs. It was also packed solid with hungry people and less than enthusiastic ladies pushing carts of food.

Although these images are quite normal in many Chinese restaurants during Dim Sum hour, what was so unique about this one is that instead of the food carts going up to your table you have to go to them to get what you want. Here you have 5-6 diners making a bee-line for the lady selling shrimp dumplings and chicken feet - it really reminded me of that scene in Jurassic Park 2 where the entire group of hunters got eaten up but velicoraptors in the tall grass area.

After did some medieval elbowing and shoving that I learned in Beijing I came back with some high-prized dishes, but no shrimp dumplings. I had to settle for shrimp wrapped in noodles.

Interestingly Time Out New York did a article on the EXACT SAME situation in the EXACT SAME restaurant a few weeks ago in their holiday issue. If only I read more, then I could have found a way to pound those other customers into oblivion.

For the full article and more, click here.

Happy New Year Everyone!

2009-01-01T01:52:00.000-05:00

Let's hope the economy will take a turn for the better, Our messiah Obama will turn it all around, Anderson Cooper finds true love, and Britney poses for Playboy or Penthouse.

Onwards and Upwards my friends!

The Last Day of 2008, cupcakes

2008-12-31T14:30:00.000-05:00

It's hard to believe but 2008 has come and gone. For me especially, it has been a really exciting year that never really stopped. Between wandering around Asia, looking for work, and juggling 2 internships and 2 classes I never really had time to breathe.

But don't think that I'm going to reflect in this entry. I spend way too much time reflecting already and I doubt that you dear readers would want to hear about everything I did and did not do this year. Besides, every blog/newspaper/magazine has devoted an article or a post on the year past. I don't want to follow suit, only to come up with a lame half-explained list that'll become my own inside joke. No, instead, I'm going to talk about how frigging cold it is outside.

It's frigging cold out.

I had to go out today to buy dessert for tomorrow's New Year's dinner. Knowing that with my family you can't really go wrong with cupcakes, I headed straight to Billy's Bakery for an assortment of butter cream goodness. I love the cupcakes at Billy's, although the staff is very complacent and rude (and this is coming from someone who frequents Magnolia's and Kim's Video) and decided to introduce my family to these wonderful morsels of heaven.

Perhaps in the future I'll write about the cupcake places in New York and try to explain why this city gets crazy over these pastries. But why stop at cupcakes? I should write about the ramen fad, and hookah bars, and chicken wings. Maybe I can throw a film review in here every few weeks. I'm going to take this blog places. It will be voice of the youth, spearheading cultural movements, creating cults and bringing down the man(!) with chicken wing reviews.

All for next year though. Until then have be safe and have fun tonight.

Shopping all the way

2008-12-29T23:32:00.000-05:00

Christmas is over. I hope everyone got what they wanted. But of course for those who didn't (ahem, PS3 mom?), those who are experience bargain hunters, or those that are just greedy, there's the After-Christmas sales, that magical time of year where people go ape shit over last season's turtlenecks and summer shorts than haunt the clearance rack.

Feeling quite unfulfilled with the clothes I got this year (somewhere in another dimension a 5-year-old version of me just shat his pants) I hit up the local malls with my parents and picked up a few shirts and jeans that made me feel like I didn't gain weight since 2007.

Well, I mean, it's also New Jersey. I can't really spend the entire day bowling can I?

Here are what my fellow shoppers are up to, courtesy of the lovingly irreverent blog, The Consumerist.

Some stores did so poor this Christmas that they've lost all hope of turning any sort of profit and have begun selling merchandise for the sake of getting rid of their inventory. How desperate are some of these stores? Well, some allow their customers to haggle for the price. Finally, I'll get to use some of the things I learned in China.

Apparently Gap missed the whole idea of After-Christmas sales and tried to rip off their loyal/tasteless customers by marking up prices on their raggedy pants. Good job Classic Khaki.

Some people are so sick of the holidays that once they are over they rip off all the decorations and toss the Christmas tree to the sidewalk with ornaments still hanging from it. Or, if you are certain drug store in Virginia, you just get really psyched for the next holiday.

In some disturbing and racist news, UPS entered a Sikh man's name as TERRORIST in their online tracking database. Sikhs aren't Muslims, very few Muslims are terrorists, and UPS could have avoided the whole pr blunder if they had just sent the man his damn package.

And finally (and this is for the store clerks and managers) beware of shoplifters.

foodz

2008-12-26T18:33:00.000-05:00

Oh man. Merry belated Christmas everyone. I just woke up from my Christmas eve food coma to find out that my sisters already ate all the leftovers and skipped town. Guess that's what I get for eating all that chicken, potatoes, and cheesecake then sleeping it off for 36 hours.

Speaking of gluttonous consumption, local wiener lover Takeru Kobayashi ate over 4 pounds of fruitcake today in an apparent effort to fight hunger. No really, he was eating to fight hunger for The Food Bank of NYC. It's still unclear how eating all that cake will fight any hunger but his own.

That's a lot of fruitcake.

Read the full article here.

China hates on the news, Batman

2008-12-24T01:03:00.000-05:00

It seems like lately the folks in that big old Chinese Communist Party have gone back to their old ways and banned several media websites, including the BBC and The New York Times (although as of today the Times has been unblocked).

Of course, part of why China blocks these news sites is to stop the rampant mudslinging by these sources. I know, the government has laughably bad public relations and made decisions I don't agree with, but really, when there are entire columns devoted to why China sucks it's understandable to maintain a form of media censorship (although I don't agree with that, either).

After all, The New York Times ran a 9-part column last year on China's environmental issues and tactfully named it Choking on Growth. Making references to China's rapid modernization and preparations for this year's Olympics, the 9 articles effectively pours acid rain on China's pre-Olympic parade.

What makes the government look so bad for me is not only their increasing sensitivity, but also the futility of these bans. Everyone can log onto the blacklisted sites using proxy servers and Firefox even has an add-on specifically made to route the censors. As for bans on movies like The Dark Knight? I don't think that any DVD shop in China is missing out on selling bootleg copies of the hit movie.

Meanwhile, a randy Chinese woman's sex video is still out and about and contaminating the innocent/horny minds of Chinese teenagers everywhere.

Jay Chou at the Mohegan Sun

2008-12-22T00:32:00.000-05:00

Thank god for good friends.

I had heard that Jay Chou, a Taiwanese mega pop star who has a huge following among Chinese Americans and real Chinese people, was going to give a concert at the Mohegan Sun hotel and casino. It is really rare that an Asian musician I actually know of performs within 100 miles of where I live and since I'm actually a fan of his work I got really excited. However, I had no idea when tickets would go on sale and when I heard from a friend that they were on sale already I had assumed that it had sold out immediately and I had missed my chance.

Then last week my friend Emily called me up and invited me to the concert, which I immediately accepted, totally blowing off any plans I had for this weekend. So last night we set out from Queens to see the master of Mandarin music.

The concert, for some strange reason, was at 2am. I guess Jay thinks he's still in Taiwan. Our tickets were in the nosebleeds, but we didn't care since our location gave us an unobstructed view of the stage. I was disappointed at the sound system, however. One would think that an auditorium in a multi-million dollar hotel and resort would at least have a top grade sound system. Jay has an amazing voice and a fantastic repertoire of songs, but the sound system only cheapened his performance.

Also, the people sitting around us listened to his music with almost no emotion. Some didn't even clap. I know some fans get into a zone, but damn, talk about a forest of statues.

After the concert ended around 4:30 we drove back to Flushing, and at 7am, we naturally had breakfast, along with an odd medley of other people, mostly club managers, hostesses, and night creatures, along with the generic hungry commuters and shop owners.

Oh Noes, it's the Fun Tax

2008-12-17T22:37:00.000-05:00

Governor David Paterson had big shoes to fill. He stepped in after Eliot Spitzer failed to live up to Albany's "bros before hos" agreement and had to resign. Many saw him as an accidental governor, and few had high hopes for him.

Today the few with high hopes are thinking about moving back to their home state after Patty-cake Paterson proposed a zillion new taxes, which pretty much destroys my way of life. Among the 137 proposed taxes, the ones that would affect me the most are the taxes on movie tickets, beer, soda, clothes, TV, taxi rides, bus rides, haircuts, and, get this, iTunes downloads.

Perhaps the most ridiculous of all is that despite the biggest tax hike in the history of New York he still wants to increase the budget by $1.4 billion.

I can say something very rude and insensitive about his blindness, but people would just think I'm talking about his actual blindness.

Below I have tallied up all the things that I normally do on a Friday night and their cost.

1 movie ticket = $12
7 beers = $49
cab ride home = $7
drunken iTunes music download = $4
total expenditures = $72

With the taxes, my new total Friday night mayhem will cost about about $74. Only a $2 difference you say? That adds up to over $100 annually, and that's only for Friday night.

Read the full article here.

In other news, Governor Paterson seemed pretty upset about his Fred Armisenization on Saturday Night Live.

I on the other hand think it's brilliant.